How to field multiple trick-or-treating invites?

[Anonymous]

My K son has been asked by several boys in his class to trick or treat. But last week our family was invited to a Kindergarten Halloween party hosted by one mom -- my son is friends with hers, but I do not know the mom very well, so we committed to that. Do I text her to see if I can invite the kids who invited my son? Or how do I gracefully decline? One of the boys who asked my son is really shy and I want him to feel included but don't feel it's my place to invite him to a Halloween party of someone I don't know well. Suggest a playdate on a diff day?

[Anonymous]

You politely decline the ones you can’t attend?

[Anonymous]

You attend the first invite you ACCEPTED and you politely decline all others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You politely decline the ones you can’t attend?

This. "Thanks so much for reaching out. Larlo has plans but can we connect them for a playdate next week?"

[Anonymous]

You stick with your OG plan and say "Thanks so much for the invite, Freddie already has plans though."

And for the shy kid you can add "I know he'd love a playdate with your Sonny - can we set something up for the Nov. 6th week?"

[Anonymous]

Yes, just go to the party as a guest. Don't ask the host anything or (obviously) invite other guests. Just tell the other families, "We'd love to, but we have other plans already!" And sure, suggest a play date on a different day if you want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You attend the first invite you ACCEPTED and you politely decline all others.

I agree with this... except if the party is a drive away and other invitations are within walking distance. I will always pick the no-driving-through-the-city-on-Halloween option, and I think others would understand -- at least I do -- if you go back and say "I didn't think about it at first, but I hate being on the road on Halloween (people walking in the road, running across the street without looking, drunk drivers). Could we make plans another time instead?"

[Anonymous]

Don't do this

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1164485.page

I had no idea how challenging halloween was these days!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You attend the first invite you ACCEPTED and you politely decline all others.

I agree with this... except if the party is a drive away and other invitations are within walking distance. I will always pick the no-driving-through-the-city-on-Halloween option, and I think others would understand -- at least I do -- if you go back and say "I didn't think about it at first, but I hate being on the road on Halloween (people walking in the road, running across the street without looking, drunk drivers). Could we make plans another time instead?"

If you "always pick" this option then you shouldn't have accepted it in the first place because you clearly would have "thought about it at first." Don't invitation shop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You attend the first invite you ACCEPTED and you politely decline all others.

I agree with this... except if the party is a drive away and other invitations are within walking distance. I will always pick the no-driving-through-the-city-on-Halloween option, and I think others would understand -- at least I do -- if you go back and say "I didn't think about it at first, but I hate being on the road on Halloween (people walking in the road, running across the street without looking, drunk drivers). Could we make plans another time instead?"

If you "always pick" this option then you shouldn't have accepted it in the first place because you clearly would have "thought about it at first." Don't invitation shop.

Hard agree. And if you decide to cancel then one should state plainily that they ar e cancelling. Not vaguely allude to it and leave it to others to figure out.

[Anonymous]

You go to the event you already accepted.

My daughter was invited by one girl. I told the mom I had not thought about Halloween yet. When I spoke to my daughter, she wanted to go with her two closest friends. One is available and now going together. Other might be going with a neighbor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You attend the first invite you ACCEPTED and you politely decline all others.

This and you don’t ask the host to invite more people!!

[Anonymous]

If it was just ToT and not a party, I would just say to add the other kids. But you can’t invite them to someone else’s party. Stick with your original plans or maybe stay until 8 and then ToT for a few minutes with the other group. I would understand that as the host. Halloween is hard to navigate.

[Anonymous]

The parties are the bomb

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You attend the first invite you ACCEPTED and you politely decline all others.

I agree with this... except if the party is a drive away and other invitations are within walking distance. I will always pick the no-driving-through-the-city-on-Halloween option, and I think others would understand -- at least I do -- if you go back and say "I didn't think about it at first, but I hate being on the road on Halloween (people walking in the road, running across the street without looking, drunk drivers). Could we make plans another time instead?"

If you "always pick" this option then you shouldn't have accepted it in the first place because you clearly would have "thought about it at first." Don't invitation shop.

Hard agree. And if you decide to cancel then one should state plainily that they ar e cancelling. Not vaguely allude to it and leave it to others to figure out.

PP here. I misread OP's original situation. I would politely decline a party on Halloween from the get-go if it wasn't nearby. Party or playdate on the weekend and ToT with friends who live in or will come to our neighborhood would be fine. My neighborhood is really fun on Halloween and my kids don't want to miss out on it anyway.