Talk to me about Bat Mitzvah parties

[Anonymous]

We're starting to plan one for late next year and don't have a clue what to think about. I had mine in my backyard years (decades ago). I know we don't want a mini-wedding. I also know we want to do "something" -- we'll likely have about 30 out of town guests/family members.
But...we don't have a huge social circle, we don't know what our daughter's social circle will look like 2 years from now but I feel like we should start doing something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're starting to plan one for late next year and don't have a clue what to think about. I had mine in my backyard years (decades ago). I know we don't want a mini-wedding. I also know we want to do "something" -- we'll likely have about 30 out of town guests/family members.
But...we don't have a huge social circle, we don't know what our daughter's social circle will look like 2 years from now but I feel like we should start doing something.

All the ones I've been to have been like mini-weddings. Over the top. Looked like the kids were having fun, though.

[Anonymous]

Lots of different options these days! It could be a ballroom and DJ kind of affair. But there's such a wide range. Something like Pinstripes has a ballroom but also "fancy" bowling. A private section of Top Golf or a Batting cage or that kind of activity. Maybe for the family, just a nice restaurant dinner and a separate kid activity like a bigger version of a regular bday party (a concert with a few friends, or a big backyard party...). Go to Israel instead. Take another special family vacation instead. Do an extra nice kiddush at shul and leave it at that.

What's your budget and a ballpark number of people? What does your kid like? Are they into a fancy party with the attention on them, or do they like to chill with just a few besties?

[Anonymous]

Things are different now than before the pandemic. Really anything goes. Do want you. I tried not to do over the top for my oldest son’s - but of course it’s still fairly expensive to feed 90 people. Start talking to people at your synagogue and hear where people are planning. Ask your daughter what she’s into. I knew my oldest son wasn’t going to be into dancing but he likes card games so we did casino tables that were a hit.

[Anonymous]

One of the best we went to was catered by chipotle. Yummy.

[Anonymous]

Destination bat mitzvah with close family. Pizza party upon return with friends.

[Anonymous]

A few we have been invited to recently. This is for a mix of kids in public school and private school who live in NW DC or close in MD
Sat service with lunch / desserts
Sun party with friends at pinstripes

[Anonymous]

Most of the ones we've been to have been mini weddings. The most low-key one was held in a rented community center room (a large one) and included a magician and catered food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A few we have been invited to recently. This is for a mix of kids in public school and private school who live in NW DC or close in MD
Sat service with lunch / desserts
Sun party with friends at pinstripes

Was looking at Bowlero in Tysons. Anyone been to a party there? That's the kind of thing I think we'd like but I don't quite get how you organize things (bowling, and a slideshow, and speeches...does it come together well?)

[Anonymous]

Was like 350 people at one I attended. Had a red carpet to walk, a celeb did a custom video introduction, goodie bags like Oscar’s, photo booths, custom sweat shirts, live band, DJ, gourmet food. Cost like $300 a hard.

But they were getting $500 to $5,000 a couple. $500 on very low end mostly higher

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Was like 350 people at one I attended. Had a red carpet to walk, a celeb did a custom video introduction, goodie bags like Oscar’s, photo booths, custom sweat shirts, live band, DJ, gourmet food. Cost like $300 a hard.

But they were getting $500 to $5,000 a couple. $500 on very low end mostly higher

Is this in reference to the gifts the bat mitzvah child received?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was like 350 people at one I attended. Had a red carpet to walk, a celeb did a custom video introduction, goodie bags like Oscar’s, photo booths, custom sweat shirts, live band, DJ, gourmet food. Cost like $300 a hard.

But they were getting $500 to $5,000 a couple. $500 on very low end mostly higher

Is this in reference to the gifts the bat mitzvah child received?

Yep. I gave $1,000 on the low end. Easily $350-$450k in gifts.

My HS kids paid for college plus downpayment on a condo post graduation with the money. I am old but I recall in 1975 a kid in HS got $40k in cash at his party. Dad put it in bonds and 1988 he bought a condo in Manhattan with money. Interest rates were crazy high 1975 to 1988. Today more like $300k he would have got

[Anonymous]

Non Jews need the most information. What time does the service end? We drop them off for the service, and now what? I told DD to call me. That was not the right thing to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Non Jews need the most information. What
time does the service end? We drop them off for the service, and now what? I told DD to call me. That was not the right thing to do.

We are all Jews deep down, embrace it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Was like 350 people at one I attended. Had a red carpet to walk, a celeb did a custom video introduction, goodie bags like Oscar’s, photo booths, custom sweat shirts, live band, DJ, gourmet food. Cost like $300 a hard.

But they were getting $500 to $5,000 a couple. $500 on very low end mostly higher

$500 as a bat mitzvah gift from one couple? I've never heard of that before. We give somewhere between $72-$108 depending on how well we know the kid/family.