Is this weird? Dog is not cuddly

[Anonymous]

We adopted an adult rescue. He is affectionate but it’s very much on his own terms. He wants pets and attention when he sees us first thing in the morning or coming home from work/school. Sometimes he wants pets at other times and will whine until we pet him. He likes to be rubbed on his chest and belly if he exposes it to you. But he’s not a Velcro dog. Once he gets his pets, he’s fine going off to do his own thing. He’s not the kind of dog who wants to be with his humans 24/7.

In particular, he never wants to “cuddle.” He doesn’t like to be hugged or hanged on or spooned. I pictured getting a dog and snuggling up together on the couch. He rarely wants to do that. He is clear about protecting his personal space boundaries when he doesn’t want pets, especially at night when tired. If you come over to him when he is cyrcked up in a ball trying to sleep, and he doesn’t want pets, he will tense and give a low rumble. If you persist, he might air snap. He’s never bitten or nipped us because we’ve learned to back off at the rumble. It’s not quite a growl but approaching that.

Is any of this unusual or concerning? I don’t have much prior experience with dogs. Other than not being very cuddly, he is a good easy dog to take care of.

[Anonymous]

A dog is a dog; a rescue dog is not a toy, nor is any dog. Get a squish mellow.

[Anonymous]

It’s normal. They have their own personalities. Does he have any history of abuse?

[Anonymous]

I have a lab who is a cuddled and a shepherd who is like yours, minus the growling. So yea some dogs want to be in their own space. A growl is not a bad thing. It’s his away of communicating to you that he doesn’t like what you’re about to do and wants you to stop.

[Anonymous]

Especially with rescues, you don’t know their back story. Keep reading his clues and be patient with him. He may change over time but some dogs aren’t cuddles in general.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A dog is a dog; a rescue dog is not a toy, nor is any dog. Get a squish mellow.

+1. Get a body pillow and cuddle with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A dog is a dog; a rescue dog is not a toy, nor is any dog. Get a squish mellow.

+1. Get a body pillow and cuddle with that.

What’s the point of a dog then?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A dog is a dog; a rescue dog is not a toy, nor is any dog. Get a squish mellow.

+1. Get a body pillow and cuddle with that.

What’s the point of a dog then?

Seriously??? If you got a dog just because you want to “cuddle” with it, you have bigger issues than DCUM can help you with.

[Anonymous]

Most dogs don’t want to be touched when they’re lying down. A lot of them adjust to it because they love us and there are incentives.

A dog sleeping near by gives the same coziness as one snuggling with you, imo. Maybe just adjust your thinking. If you say his name, does he give you a tail thump? That can release the right brain chemicals for me.

Probably the best time for hugs and snuggles is when he’s excitedly greeting you, like if youve been away, or right after a walk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A dog is a dog; a rescue dog is not a toy, nor is any dog. Get a squish mellow.

+1. Get a body pillow and cuddle with that.

What’s the point of a dog then?

Companionship and a relationship.

[Anonymous]

The dog is normal. You are weird.

I'm on the fence about the growl and snap. My general position is to not tolerate a family dog that snaps when you wake him up or groom him or other things he happens not to like. However, I also don't hassle a dog or squeeze him to me so it's hard to say how egregious his response is.

[Anonymous]

I have 3 dogs currently and have had 4 others in the past. Of the 7, 1 was a huge cuddler, wanted to be touching you at all times. Super needy, but sweet and loving. Three have been situationally okay with it—when they came to me, but not if I went to them. The other 3 wanted to know where I was at all times, but would choose a bed across the room where they could keep an eye on things from a distance. All normal.

If cuddling is important to you, you can stack the cards in your favor by looking for a breed that was bred to be a lapdog. If you’re expecting your lab or shepherd to cuddle, it’s going to be an individual dog thing, vs a cavalier, papillon, or shitzu that was bred to sit in laps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The dog is normal. You are weird.

I'm on the fence about the growl and snap. My general position is to not tolerate a family dog that snaps when you wake him up or groom him or other things he happens not to like. However, I also don't hassle a dog or squeeze him to me so it's hard to say how egregious his response is.

I probably wouldn’t trust this dog around children. It only takes one well-time “snap” to permanently disfigure a child. But OP doesn’t say whether she has kids in the house.

[Anonymous]

It’s weird to want to cuddle with the dog while watching tv?

I don’t mean like having him in my lap. I want him to lay down next to me so I can pay him while watching tv.

[Anonymous]

It's extremely normal for dogs to not want to be hugged or spooned. Pet experts heavily discourage children hugging dogs. A lot of dogs get stressed in this situations.

Puppies are cuddlier but many grow out of it. A "cuddly" dog will like to sit next to you or on your lap, but they'll get uncomfortable if you enclose them.