DS mimicking friend’s speech impediment

[Anonymous]

I’m sure I’ll get flamed for this, but my DS, 3, has been copying/affecting his BFF’s speech impediment. I’m wondering if there’s anything I should say/do or just let him continue and hope it’s a phase.

The friend is a sweet little boy who has a significant stutter and unique pronunciations of certain words (“wa-wa-wa-waaaaad-oor” for water or “mal-mal-mal-mmmmmm-maaaaalllllk” for milk). My son has taken to mimicking the stutter and different pronunciations both at school and at home. He is not making fun of his friend, and if I gently ask why he’s pronouncing a word a certain way, he will say because that’s how Larlo says it. If I correct him and say you know how to say water the right way, he will mispronounce it and say no, this is just how Larlo says it so that’s how I say it.

The boys are in the same preschool class, on the same soccer team, and we see the family a lot at the playground. Of course I’m not going to stop the kids playing together, but I also want to make sure that my child is not going to wind up with a speech issue if we don’t correct this affect he has taken in trying to sound like his buddy. It’s actually kind of sweet in a way, but I also have some concerns. Has anyone been there done that before?

[Anonymous]

He won’t end up with a speech issue. Study the neurological roots of speech issues and you’ll see that your concern is frivolous.

[Anonymous]

Just tell him to say it the way you and your spouse say it. Tell him to copy adults, not children.

[Anonymous]

That is so cruel. I don't care if he is only 3. You don't do that.

[Anonymous]

My child’s best friend had a similar speech impediment at that age and my child copied them. It was a non-issue. Kids don’t spend enough time together to make it permanent.

[Anonymous]

I thought the concern was about hurting the other child's feelings but the concern is about your kid catching a speech impediment?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought the concern was about hurting the other child's feelings but the concern is about your kid catching a speech impediment?

apparently so... amazing family.

[Anonymous]

OP, your child can’t catch or create a stutter. He can mimic his friend, but will not mimic his way into stuttering.

[Anonymous]

TikTok has proven that tics are contagious.

OP—I would reinforce that we say words the right way and that some people take longer to learn than others. The best thing to do is model the word the right way.

[Anonymous]

It's normal for kids this age to be mini parrots and repeat what they hear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:TikTok has proven that tics are contagious.

OP—I would reinforce that we say words the right way and that some people take longer to learn than others. The best thing to do is model the word the right way.

+1

Reinforce the right way to say it at home. Practice the correct wave saying it as well. I wouldn’t mention anything about the other child but just work with your own child.

[Anonymous]

You definitely need to stop this ASAP. The other child might not understand it yet. But if that kid's parent heard your child imitating him, they'd be understandably upset.

I know a 3-year-old wouldn't understand being hurtful, so I will agree with the person who said you need to tell him to copy a grownup, not a child. And as soon as you think your child will understand, you need to work with them to never imitate a speech impediment again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That is so cruel. I don't care if he is only 3. You don't do that.

It sounds like OP's kid isn't making fun of his friend. As an adult, I find that I tend to adopt the speech patterns of the people I hang out with. It's how I lost my NY accent after a couple years in VA and why I say "y'all" when others are doing so. I'm not making fun of Virginians, I am blending in. When my kids were little, they would speak the way their foreign nanny (who we all loved) spoke to them. It is the same with this 3 year old. He is speaking the way his friend does. It isn't cruel, it's assimilation and it's human.

That said, I agree with others that OP should work with her son to pronounce the words correctly.

[Anonymous]

Her son isn’t making fun of his friend! He is speaking like him because kids like being like other kids. There’s nothing cruel or teasing going on. They are a little three-year-old kids. I don’t have any advice, but also hope it is just a phase. I think all you can do is tell your son do you want him to talk like he talks because he is an individual, and not his friend. He’s not going to “catch” a speech impediment, but I would also be a little nervous that there could be some type of lingering impact if it’s not corrected. You are not overreacting or frivolous to have concerns about this. Any good parent would.

[Anonymous]

OP - I was in this exact situation! 4 year old DS was mimicking a 3 year old friend who had a significant speech delay (She had a "special machine with buttons" to say words so she could communicate with teachers). He was mimicking. When DS would say "Waaar" for water, I tried not to make a big deal of it and just say, "Hmmm. Do you mean "water"? Ok, I wasn't sure what you were saying. Here's water." He also wanted me to buy him the "really cool machine." It did pass. Nobody, as far as I know, felt bad... He's a preschooler and was simply copying his friend. Now that has passed and he's moved on to growling, glaring, and waving his arms way too quickly in a way that just annoys the crap out of me (There's a misbehaved kid who is constantly doing this at school). I wish he could copy great behavior, but no... He only seems to mimic behaviors and words I'd prefer not. He also screamed "damn it!!" the other day.... DH said "Damn it" probably once a few months ago. Ugh!