November

[ Portions of this article have been rewritten based on reader input. ]

It starts with a simple, innocent-sounding post. Someone is available to babysit. "I've heard that you are great," states a response. "I plan to hire you on Friday so my husband and I can go out," follows another. "I hired her and she was great," exclaims an additional accolade. And then, "Thank you for the kind words. I appreciate the great response." Taken nearly word-for-word from a recent thread in the DCUM nanny forums, this is an example of a sock puppet in action. The entire exchange was composed by a single individual hoping to drum up business.

In 1993, the World Wide Web — what many people have wrongly come to consider synonymous with "The Internet" — was launched. That same year, The New Yorker published a cartoon by Peter Steiner showing two dogs sitting in front of a computer with the caption, "On the Internet, nobody knows you're a dog". According to Wikipedia, Steiner didn't attach a "profound" meaning to the cartoon. Nevertheless, he managed to capture an essential truth of the online age and the underlying message — intended or not — is one of which we frequently need to remind ourselves. As a number of anecdotes from my experience with the "nanny ads" on DCUM illustrate, this is especially the case when using the Internet as a means of finding a nanny or other childcare professional. 

(1)   Find an OB that you trust, who delivers at a hospital you like.  Trust your gut – if something doesn’t feel right with your doctor, switch.  It is never too late.

(2)   Bring an advocate with you to the hospital, whether it is your husband, partner, doula, mother, etc.  Even at the best hospitals, nurses are overworked and some, unfortunately, are not what you would hope for in a healthcare setting.

(3)   Read up on C-sections, even if you are convinced you're not going to have one.  Talk with your doctor about the benefits and risks of C-sections and how s/he decides to recommend a non-emergency section.