Anonymous wrote:DH is selfish and lazy = 1 kid. Case closed.
Anonymous wrote:People say the dumbest things. I'm preg with DC2 (DC1 is a girl) and the other day at the dentist, both the secretary and the hygienist said "Oh, I hope you have a boy" in such an incredibly concerned way. This is after I made it crystal clear that I have zero preference for either sex. I only heard about people saying things like that on DCUM, couldn't believe it happened IRL. I should've said "Well, I don't" but I was so stunned. They are both moms to only boys and I guess they hope I get to experience something similar to what they have, but it's an insulting to my potential DD2! Sorry, didn't mean to take over with my vent. OP, it is so annoying the things people say about your reproduction is my point.
Anonymous wrote:We're one and done. Whenever someone asks when the next one is coming, I respond with, "Why would we have another? We think we did pretty well the first time, don't want to jinx it!"
DH and I both had siblings growing up. We were never close, as children or adults. Never felt like having multiple children was a "gift" to the first kiddo.
Anonymous wrote:I was at lunch this week with coworkers. Our friend of ours has an only grown daughter who has breast cancer. One of my coworkers actually said that it's too bad our friend has one child because if the child dies she will have no children. If you have two at least you'd have one left. I was so shocked I didn't know what to say.
BTW. I have an only also.
Anonymous wrote:This is quite interesting. I am an only child, and didn't like it growing up (I was very lonely). But as an adult I really dislike being an only child. My parents live on the Wes tCoast and I only see them once a year. My in-laws live in the midwest and we only see them once a year (but are not close with them). I feel very alone in life. We have no family in the area and have no one to spend holidays with. Being an only child with no family around is super lonely.
We have a child who is only 6 months old but I am already planning to get pregnant with #2 soon. I would feel so sad for her if she grew up to be an only child since we have no family in the area and I did not like being an only child.
Most of my friends have only 1 child by choice. My own parents are quite disapproving of us having more than 1! They don't understand why anyone would want more than 1. They don't understand how lonely I was as a child and lonely I still am.
Personally I never considered myself to be in a "real family" growing up because I was an only child--part of that was that we really didn't have any family traditions and I felt so isolated from my large, extended family (grandparents, cousins, etc.) who lived thousands of miles away. I would have had a much different experience if I had grown up near extended family.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:IMO, only children tend to be more self absorbed later in life. I have multiple close friends who I love, but who we all describe as "such only children" and the meaning is instantly understood. The only time I've seen only children avoid this is when there is a specific source of hardship in childhood so that they learn it isn't all about them (eg, a parent has an illness).
Having said this, I don't love the idea of having a second child, but the above keeps me motivated to do so.
so do adults with siblings tend to be gossiping hens later in life?
Anonymous wrote:I am an only child and was born in a country and a generation (former USSR in 1970s) where being an only child was the norm, rather than the exception. As a result, a lot of my Russian friends are also onlys and I haven't noticed them being any more selfish than anyone with multiple siblings.
We chose to have two children, but only because I thought it would be fun, not out of some fear of deprivation - I feel particularly deprived as a child - unlike the poster above, being an only bothered me not at all. I am, however, a complete and utter extravert so that may have made a difference. OP, your child may feel lonely or he/she may not - it really depends on the child's personality rather than anything else. Plenty of people have siblings and do not get along with them whatsoever (see family forum for multiple examples). So rock on with your only-child-having self and ignore the comments people make in RL.