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Parenting -- Special Concerns
Reply to "Do you regret your adoption?"
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[quote=Anonymous]"If I had my life over again, I would not adopt. It has been the biggest regret of my life. Every day I feel I am being punished. I did it out of kindness, and it has backfired on me. Genes will out at the end of the day and you can't fix damaged children." I know a heck of a lot of parents --both related to me and otherwise -- who have the same thoughts about their own bio kids who grew up in perfectly normal middle-class households. It's a just a little more taboo to say such things out loud when you made 'em yourself, because it usually inculpates you. Life's a crapshoot. You don't know if the child you bear or adopt is going to be challenging (bipolar/autistic/ADD) in some way you don't even realize yet. But people seem to take for granted problems that exist with bio kids when they're lamenting problems with adopted kids. A child I knew down the block, who had been foster kid and later adopted, held his family up at knife point. My sister did the exact same thing to us five years later, and she truly hadn't been abused as a child. I'm not saying that decent resources and patient families don't make a huge difference, especially in the early childhood years. But if love doesn't necessarily conquer all, that's true of all children.[/quote]
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