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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Best Friend asked for help and now won't speak to me..."
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[quote=Anonymous]I am not sure this is the right forum because it is not a romantic relationship, but my best friend, mother of my god-child who I have known for a long time has been struggling a lot recently. As long as I have known her she has used alcohol as a way to cope with stress. Her only child is about to turn 4, she had really gotten her life together but over the last year she has started to go downhill again. She calls me in the early evenings, slurring her speech and talking about how she cannot cope with her child and the constant responsibility. She admits to hiding in the bathroom from her son to get a break. And she also admits to throwing things at her husbands head in anger. She lost a baby very early in the pregnancy at the end of last year, and while drinking wasn't automatically the cause she was very drunk during the early parts of that pregnancy and crying to me about how she wasn't ready to get clean. At this point we haven't had a conversation in the last six months were she remembers anything I have said (can't make plans, can't really share anything with her that she will retain...) So two nights ago, she drunkenly admits that that piece on the Today show about moms drinking had her concerned, and I say that I share her concerns and tried talking to her about some steps she could look into taking and that no matter what I was there to support her. Well she escalated from being self-deprecating to being extremely defensive and by the time she had sobered the next day she came at me saying I was calling her a bad mom, and a bad friend. Thing is, I don't think she is a bad mom, and I know for a fact that she is capable of being a good friend and I never meant to judge or attack her- just shared my concerns and said don't you deserve to feel better? It really felt like she was asking me for help and when I tried she got very defensive and I think I have lost what was at one point in my life a important friendship. Should I leave her alone and let her be mad or try reaching out again?[/quote]
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