Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
LGBTQIA+ Issues and Relationship Discussion
Reply to "Am I crazy? Please tell me if I am. "
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Facts: 1. My wife is Asian and her mother refused to come to our wedding because she is anti-gay. She goes to alllll weddings, including, for example, a friend’s grandchild’s wedding in Seoul. Months after refusing to come to our wedding, she asked my wife if she could come stay with us in DC so she could take the train to a distant cousin’s NYC wedding. 2. After my brutal 4-year infertility slog, her mother was obviously unhappy to learn that I was finally pregnant and was completely unsupportive to my wife and me. She travels nonstop, but did not come meet our first child until he was 2 years old. 3. About a year ago, her mother had a major health event that left her almost bedridden. Suddenly, now that she has nothing else to do, she calls and is interested in my wife and our children. She continually asked my wife to bring our kids (now 2 and 4) to visit her (which requires 25+ hours of travel each way). 4. My wife knows I do not like her mother. Not because I have ever said so, but because she just knows. But I came on the trip. I didn’t complain. I was pleasant. I worked to facilitate my children’s interaction with her mother. I told my wife that a friend commented that bringing my children “literally half way around the world,” under these circumstances was, “commendable,” and that I explained that I was important to me to support my wife. When I told my wife this, she got so angry and absolutely does not comprehend why it’s “commendable.” She told me she doesn’t need that and that I shouldn’t have anything to do with her mother ever again. She also said that I “judged” her mother for her refusal to come to our wedding and being displeased/unsupportive/absent re: the birth of our child, which blew my mind. If this woman were anyone but my wife’s mother, I would have verbally chewed her up and spit her out and would certainly not have her in my life in ANY capacity. But unfortunately she IS my spouse’s mother, so here I am taking my young kids to Asia and trying to get my kids to play with her. And my wife is furious with me for telling her the commendable comment and then, when she asked why my coming on the Asia trip was commendable, my having the audacity to remind her that her mom skipped our wedding and wasn’t happy about the birth of our child/children. How would you have handled the mother in law in my situation? What would your reaction to my wife be if you were me? Trying to make sense of things…. [/quote] Try to understand that the MIL did not grow up in America and the culture she grew up in is vastly different. While it may be incomprehensible to you that she does not immediately condone a same sex relationship, you were raised in a completely different place with different mores. Just saying to put yourself in her shoes/culture. [/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics