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Reply to "How do you visit multiple, rural immediate-family relatives?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The answer is that you don't have to see them every year. How often can you reasonably travel? once a year? twice? more? Then you make a schedule...ex: two trips a year, you travel to everyone once every other year, if they want to see you more often they have to travel to you. [/quote] OP here, I probably should have also mentioned that neither DH nor I is from somewhere rural so our relatives moved there. The two places we visit every year are where we grew up. Anyway, so I think its definitely reasonable to make the trip every other year. I worry about our vacation time and since it takes a whole day to travel to each of these places it would be only a short visit. The one trip I worry is not feasible is to see my MIL. No airports, its a 10 hour drive which I just don't see happening with toddlers. She moved from an easily accessible city to somewhere completely inaccessible, but in the same town as her new husband's family and far from us. I almost feel like if you move to a rural area and far away from family the effort should be on your end. But again, I feel guilty if we don't reciprocate. [/quote] I agree, to a point. If you feel like your MIL is not making the effort at ALL, then obviously it's not that important to her to have your kids in her life. But if she comes to you, say, once a year, then it's reasonable for you to go to her once a year or every other year. But everyone is busy and ultimately you and your DH have to decide (together) how much of a role your extended family is going to play in your kids' lives. Life's too short to go purely out of guilt, but if you want your kids to have true relationships with these people, you're going to have to make sure they see them, one way or the other. I don't know if they are nice people or not, and I don't know how you feel about family in general. It's up to you AND DH to figure that out. Where does your MIL live that's within a 10-hour drive of DC but has no closer airport, anyway? [/quote]
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