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For the moms who didn’t breastfeed in the hospital
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Anonymous
| I’m delivering at a baby friendly hospital, which is very supportive of breastfeeding and all nurses are certified lactation consultants. They push breastfeeding hard. But I do not want to breastfeed this time. For medically valid reasons and personal reasons. I’m nervous about having to deal with the formula conversation when I go into the hospital for delivery. I inquired about how to use formula during the hospital tour and they basically talked me out of going that route and to EBF. That was months ago and I wasn’t leaning towards breastfeeding at that time either. I felt guilted into going along with their breastfeeding plan. How did you advocate for yourself? Or maybe I just need an internet pep-talk? I realize I’m dreading the hospital stay and it’s because I don’t want to deal with their guilt about this topic. I’m hormonal enough, I just want to enjoy this baby... and I think formula/bottle feeding is the way I can do that this time. |
Anonymous
| There are signs you can put on the door. I had breast surgery so I just told them that. |
Anonymous
| Don’t worry about what they are going to say. They are going to encourage you to breastfeed. That is their job since the APA recommendation is to encourage breastfeeding. But you are the baby’s mom and you get to decide what is best for you and for the baby. Thank them politely for the information, but explain that you feel it’s best for you to use formula. No one needs to feel guilty. They are doing their job and you are doing yours. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
I’m probably going to screenshot this so I can reread it when I’m in the hospital and feeling nervous about it. Thanks. |
Anonymous
| I just kept saying "no thank you". I didn't go into a big explanation about why, just "no thank you". The nurses were pushy but the lactation consultant was actually the least pushy out of everyone. |
Anonymous
|
I’d have husband/other family member step in and say something.
Not that i don’t think you can advocate for yourself, but birth isn’t some easy peasy task and it would be helpful to have some back up when you’re exhausted. Also, you could just bring your own formula and feed without having to request anything. |
Anonymous
| Not to digress, but do deal with leaky colostrum for the first few days? Do you just manually express it? And what about engorgement soon after that? |
Anonymous
|
I had a really difficult experience with my first in the hospital who was struggling to latch. It was a BF hospital, and I felt really pressured by the nurses to keep nurses through my cracked nipples and was petrified leaving the hospital because I hadn't once gotten her to latch without help.
For my second, I brought an 8-pack of RTF nursettes with me so that I did not have to deal with the nurses to get formula if I wanted it. In the end, I EBF'ed my second for 13 mos...but bringing formula was very reassuring for me. If you're nervous, you might consider bringing some to get over the hump of asking for the first bottle. |
Anonymous
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Why not breastfeed for just a few weeks?
The formula still needs to be properly warmed in the hospital. |
Anonymous
You can give ready to feed at room temperature. No need to warm it. |
Anonymous
| My friend also decided against breastfeeding. They had a whiteboard in her room where they wrote the names of the nurses, etc. Next to "Lactation Consultant", she erased the name and wrote "Similac". Just stick to your decision, and don't engage in any conversation/debate about it. It will be good practice for the future when you'll need to stick up for the needs of your child. |
Anonymous
That seems hard on a little tummy/system designed to receive warm milk. What about bringing a bottle warmer with you? |
Anonymous
| Take some ready to feed nursettes. |
Anonymous
|
When you first arrive, explain to the first nurse you speak to that you will be formula feeding and that you do not want the nurses’ time wasted, or your stress level increased, by breastfeeding conversations. Ask, “will that be a problem?” and get a “no” out of her. You can also ask, “what is the easiest way to communicate that to the nurses I’ll be interacting with?” If you’re polite and firm, it shouldn’t be a problem. If the nurse hems and haws, ask for a supervisor. if you don’t want to be that direct when you’re nervous and hormonal, have your partner do the talking.
I did this and the nurse said, “sure, no problem.” There was a note on the door and bassinet. One person missed it (or pretended to), I smiled and said “we’re formula feeding, but thank you— I think there’s a sign on the door?” and she actually apologized. It was way less of a thing than I had worried it would be. If anyone brings it up, “there should be a note on my file/sign on the door— is it not there?” Again, have your partner go to the supervisor if needed. Don’t explain why. It’s none of their business. |