Are East Asian and/or Indian men attractive?

[Anonymous]

What is it you want to hear, OP? What excuse do you need to make for yourself? Numbers of us have told you what appeals to women. Why do you think all people should be equally attractive? Why do men go more for slim blondes than chubby brunettes? Why do white women go more for other white men than for Asian men? It's just how it is.

I know lots of Asian-American men with white American wives. I'm a white American woman with an Asian immigrant husband. I'm sure I'm not attractive enough for you, so I'm one of the millions of women you ignore in your pathetic quest for Ms. Perfect White Woman.

If you can't attract a woman, you're doing something wrong, or going after unattainable women. You are not automatically entitled to the hottest women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is it you want to hear, OP? What excuse do you need to make for yourself? Numbers of us have told you what appeals to women. Why do you think all people should be equally attractive? Why do men go more for slim blondes than chubby brunettes? Why do white women go more for other white men than for Asian men? It's just how it is.

I know lots of Asian-American men with white American wives. I'm a white American woman with an Asian immigrant husband. I'm sure I'm not attractive enough for you, so I'm one of the millions of women you ignore in your pathetic quest for Ms. Perfect White Woman.

If you can't attract a woman, you're doing something wrong, or going after unattainable women. You are not automatically entitled to the hottest women.

Wow, I find it amusing how people assume I have a fetish for white women. Nowhere in any of my posts did I mention a preference for any racial group. It just so happens that my grad school is mostly non-Asian.

I don't know, I'm just a little troubled by your comparison of "Asian" to "chubby brunette" and "slim blonde" to "white men". I mean, most people (not all) can lose weight if they put in the time/effort. The only way for me to "turn white" is through plastic surgery- something I'm not willing to do.

I'm not trying to start an argument but it just troubles me to believe that "it's just how it is"; surely, there's an explanation. I grew up here and I consider myself an American man. If western women (of any race) assume that there are cultural differences between us, then that's completely understandable. But if it is something else, then I would like to know why that is.

[Anonymous]

I dated a guy who was born in the US but his parents were both East Asian. I was the first non-Asian girl he slept with. He was astonished at how wide my hips were and told me I could lose a few pounds. I was 5'3" and 115 lbs. No dude, you just don't like my body type.
It didn't work out.

As for Indian men, I only find big noses attractive if you have high cheek bones.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look, you have to pity OP. Apparently she has never seen East Asian and/or Indian men and doesn't know if they are attractive. The girl has a right to know.

Next, she'll wants us to tell her if the ever exotic English, Norwegians, Czechs and Croatians are attractive.

Let's open the world of men to our OP, I say.

I'm actually a Taiwanese guy who grew up here and I was just wondering why women seem to have a problem with us.

I think it's just you OP.

[Anonymous]

How tall are you, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How tall are you, OP?

I'm 5'10. 5'11 in shoes.

[Anonymous]

OP I said it before and I will say it again.... get some confidence. If you like yourself and are confident other people will like you.

[Anonymous]

If you are 5'10", clean, and have a nice personality, you should have no trouble meeting a lovely young woman regardless of race. If you are having difficulty getting a specific type of woman, maybe that's the wrong type for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I said it before and I will say it again.... get some confidence. If you like yourself and are confident other people will like you.

I wish I was confident. It's just hard to be confident when most western women consider you less attractive than white men from the get-go. It's also hard to be confident when many western women associate men of my race with misogyny, nerdiness, and being a momma's boy.

[Anonymous]

So date an Asian woman. Or will they not date you either? I bet they run a mile when they sense your lack of confidence and entitled attitude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So date an Asian woman. Or will they not date you either? I bet they run a mile when they sense your lack of confidence and entitled attitude.

By "western" I mean any woman of any race who grew up here and shares my same cultural background (American). Again, I'm not sure why I sound "entitled" to you, because all I'm trying to do is figure out why my race seems to be an impediment to attracting western women (of any racial background); if women are just put off by stereotypes associated with Asian men, then that's not too hard to deal with, because those can be somewhat easily disproven. However, if women, in general, aren't physically attracted to Asian men, then that's rather hard to deal with. I'm just here to figure out whether it's social stigma or physical characteristics.

Again, I do not expect every woman in the western hemisphere to be attracted to me; I'm just trying to figure out why my race seems to be a problem for many of them.

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm going to take you at face value and try to answer your real question.

In American culture, white men are represented by media/cultural touchstones as the norm/"hero," black/latino men are represented as hyper-sexual/masculine and asian men are represented as nerds if they are americanized (with all the accompanying overtones of being unathletic, effete and weak) and as backwards boors if they are not americanized (momma's boys with chauvinist/mysoginist attitudes). Obviously, not everyone is going to fit the stereotype, but on a subconcious level, people are going to have that bias.

In addition to the cultural stuff, I think there is the issue that women like to feel feminine/ dainty in comparison to the man they are dating. Not always true, but most of the time I think that factors in. Asian men tend to be on the shorter side, but more importantly tend to be slimly built. So even a woman who is shorter than you by 3 inches may perceive you as too small, if your wrists are narrower than hers, and you wear smaller clothes than she does, etc. this is compounded by the fact that even slight, short American women tend to be heavier than foreign counterparts and may want someone who weighs more than they do.

This said, these attitudes are just things that will make you date fewer women. They won't make you date fewer great women. The really women who are right for you will see your worth the more you put yourself out there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm going to take you at face value and try to answer your real question.

In American culture, white men are represented by media/cultural touchstones as the norm/"hero," black/latino men are represented as hyper-sexual/masculine and asian men are represented as nerds if they are americanized (with all the accompanying overtones of being unathletic, effete and weak) and as backwards boors if they are not americanized (momma's boys with chauvinist/mysoginist attitudes). Obviously, not everyone is going to fit the stereotype, but on a subconcious level, people are going to have that bias.

In addition to the cultural stuff, I think there is the issue that women like to feel feminine/ dainty in comparison to the man they are dating. Not always true, but most of the time I think that factors in. Asian men tend to be on the shorter side, but more importantly tend to be slimly built. So even a woman who is shorter than you by 3 inches may perceive you as too small, if your wrists are narrower than hers, and you wear smaller clothes than she does, etc. this is compounded by the fact that even slight, short American women tend to be heavier than foreign counterparts and may want someone who weighs more than they do.

This said, these attitudes are just things that will make you date fewer women. They won't make you date fewer great women. The really women who are right for you will see your worth the more you put yourself out there.

I see, so how should I overcome the cultural stereotypes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm going to take you at face value and try to answer your real question.

In American culture, white men are represented by media/cultural touchstones as the norm/"hero," black/latino men are represented as hyper-sexual/masculine and asian men are represented as nerds if they are americanized (with all the accompanying overtones of being unathletic, effete and weak) and as backwards boors if they are not americanized (momma's boys with chauvinist/mysoginist attitudes). Obviously, not everyone is going to fit the stereotype, but on a subconcious level, people are going to have that bias.

In addition to the cultural stuff, I think there is the issue that women like to feel feminine/ dainty in comparison to the man they are dating. Not always true, but most of the time I think that factors in. Asian men tend to be on the shorter side, but more importantly tend to be slimly built. So even a woman who is shorter than you by 3 inches may perceive you as too small, if your wrists are narrower than hers, and you wear smaller clothes than she does, etc. this is compounded by the fact that even slight, short American women tend to be heavier than foreign counterparts and may want someone who weighs more than they do.

This said, these attitudes are just things that will make you date fewer women. They won't make you date fewer great women. The really women who are right for you will see your worth the more you put yourself out there.

I see, so how should I overcome the cultural stereotypes?

Go to Gold Gym!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm going to take you at face value and try to answer your real question.

In American culture, white men are represented by media/cultural touchstones as the norm/"hero," black/latino men are represented as hyper-sexual/masculine and asian men are represented as nerds if they are americanized (with all the accompanying overtones of being unathletic, effete and weak) and as backwards boors if they are not americanized (momma's boys with chauvinist/mysoginist attitudes). Obviously, not everyone is going to fit the stereotype, but on a subconcious level, people are going to have that bias.

In addition to the cultural stuff, I think there is the issue that women like to feel feminine/ dainty in comparison to the man they are dating. Not always true, but most of the time I think that factors in. Asian men tend to be on the shorter side, but more importantly tend to be slimly built. So even a woman who is shorter than you by 3 inches may perceive you as too small, if your wrists are narrower than hers, and you wear smaller clothes than she does, etc. this is compounded by the fact that even slight, short American women tend to be heavier than foreign counterparts and may want someone who weighs more than they do.

This said, these attitudes are just things that will make you date fewer women. They won't make you date fewer great women. The really women who are right for you will see your worth the more you put yourself out there.

And btw what do you mean by hyper-sexual?

Also, by masculine/effeminate, do you mean personality-wise or physicality-wise? I'm 5'10 and 170 lbs so I'm pretty normal for an American male so I'm not sure if people perceive me as effeminate based on my build. However, if you mean people think I have an effeminate personality, then I understand.