Can we afford private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. The costs will continue. You have 3 kids and are at 185k. The math does not work.

Our kids are in private now. We can do it and not feel crunched until high school. The only way we are affording high school and college is major sacrifices.

Situation is are are divorced mid 40s. Two kids. We each make about 200k a year. I have 780 in retirement. Ex has $1 million and a pension. We both own homes. We have about 60k saved for college.

Our plan is that when high school costs 25k a year for each kid in a few years, we are both selling our homes and renting so we have plenty of money to fund both private high school and 4 years of college for the kids.

We see no point in maintaining large homes when there is no one home post college: we are downsizing to pay for high school and college. Most people are not willing to do this.

Dang. You two are still planning everything together and should consider reconciling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. The costs will continue. You have 3 kids and are at 185k. The math does not work.

Our kids are in private now. We can do it and not feel crunched until high school. The only way we are affording high school and college is major sacrifices.

Situation is are are divorced mid 40s. Two kids. We each make about 200k a year. I have 780 in retirement. Ex has $1 million and a pension. We both own homes. We have about 60k saved for college.

Our plan is that when high school costs 25k a year for each kid in a few years, we are both selling our homes and renting so we have plenty of money to fund both private high school and 4 years of college for the kids.

We see no point in maintaining large homes when there is no one home post college: we are downsizing to pay for high school and college. Most people are not willing to do this.

Dang. You two are still planning everything together and should consider reconciling.

Planning how to pay for our kids education has zero to do with marriage. We are practical parents (horrible marriage the entire time, unplanned kids and neither will remarry. We have separate retirement plans and different location plans as soon as the youngest goes to college). This is how parents put kids first…yes, possible divorced despite naysayer opinions).

The point of my addition was that most people are not willing to make major sacrifices to fund private school. OP can’t afford it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. The costs will continue. You have 3 kids and are at 185k. The math does not work.

Our kids are in private now. We can do it and not feel crunched until high school. The only way we are affording high school and college is major sacrifices.

Situation is are are divorced mid 40s. Two kids. We each make about 200k a year. I have 780 in retirement. Ex has $1 million and a pension. We both own homes. We have about 60k saved for college.

Our plan is that when high school costs 25k a year for each kid in a few years, we are both selling our homes and renting so we have plenty of money to fund both private high school and 4 years of college for the kids.

We see no point in maintaining large homes when there is no one home post college: we are downsizing to pay for high school and college. Most people are not willing to do this.

Count me as someone who would not do this.

Curious what about this shocks you.

I have lived in six states and if I count the number of moves in my life from birth, I am in my 27th location. I am mid 40s. I don’t like homeownership and I have owned a few homes. I can’t wait to sell and downsize for high school and college. I will rent those years. When I am older, I may buy a small place to die in for what I think will be the last 20 years of life. My ex plans to rent forever after selling a house that is too big for one person even with kids half the time. I will be investing any extra that is left over and not used for college or high school costs.

[Anonymous]

I would not sell my house to pay my kid's HS tuition. But sounds like it makes sense for you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not sell my house to pay my kid's HS tuition. But sounds like it makes sense for you!

Got it. Neither of us want to live alone in 4,000 sf houses when kids are older. Too much upkeep and a waste of space. Also, I want to move as soon as kids are in college. Ex does as well. Yes, makes sense for us.

[Anonymous]

I have read that it takes a toll on the college students when their parents immediate decide to sell the family home.

If you can wait a few years, then the college students (DD or DS) may like being able to "go home" while they are still adjusting to college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have read that it takes a toll on the college students when their parents immediate decide to sell the family home.

If you can wait a few years, then the college students (DD or DS) may like being able to "go home" while they are still adjusting to college.

If you are responding to me, I am divorced and there are two homes. We are both selling these homes the spring before high school —well before college. Kids already know. We are sending our kids to private school and the houses are not near where the private school options are. No reason to keep two large houses when they’re not going to the public school. Both plan to rent houses. Both of us will downsize to townhouses or condos when they go to college. There’s no real reason to maintain two homes when there is no single family home to come home to after college. Selling these houses will pay for high school and college. Some will be left over for smaller property later on.

[Anonymous]

OP, this is a really bad idea.

1) You can't afford it.
2) Your rationale for wanting to make it work is basically "because it's there"
3) Talk to adults who went to elite schools - many of them don't see the value in retrospect
4) If you do force this, you'll be unable to afford anything else (like nearly literally) and your kids will be surrounded by wealth. It will be a horrible experience for them.


Take the advice from the board. Consider a move. Get a tutor. Invest in enrichment activities. Don't succumb to a private school trying to prey on the insecurities of the middle class.