Hall pass empty promise rugswept

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08/10/2018 07:40

Subject: Hall pass empty promise rugswept

quote

Anonymous

I am clearly unhappy about this.

My husband has cheated in the past. He's cheated in a really bad way. It was with a sex worker right after he'd snubbed my birthday. Last year he neglected to get me a present for my birthday, claiming to be broke. Okay I can look past that if he's being honest. But he wasn't. He didn't even have sex with me on my birthday (apparently he was too busy posting celebrity f***-marry-kill stuff publicly to his Facebook wall) or post a happy birthday to my Facebook wall. I felt like a fool on Facebook as a result, and overall miserable about how my birthday turned out, due to him and others snubbing it. He knew this, as I vented about it a few days later. A few weeks later, his idea of making it up to me is to hastily hand me a $25 gift card while saying "happy belated birthday" as we're paying for our groceries at the grocery store checkout (yes, the gift card was from that grocery store). That same day, he goes to the strip club and pays $240 for a VIP room session with a stripper! I found out when I snooped through his bankcard transaction records, which I did after his bankcard got rejected upon trying to pay a household bill. Even worse, he knew very well how upset I was about him visiting strip clubs, as he'd betrayed me by going there other times before. Plus, this particular club is known for sexual favors...which my husband later admitted to getting. That stripper in particular is known to do extras but is also beautiful and successful enough to be featured on the club's billboard, calendar, and in magazine publications. She might just be a stripper but she definitely has some one-ups on me lookswise, on top of getting more money and appreciation from my husband than I do.

I was very angry and started the in-house separation process while consulting with attorneys, but ended up staying only because of finding out I was pregnant again and then losing my job (I later found full-time employment again at 5-6 months pregnant). I still harbored resentment about my rudely neglected birthday and being cheated on with a stripper. I feel I'm in a position to call all the shots if my husband wants to salvage this marriage. He agreed he'd "do anything" for me to stay, work things out, and keep our family together.

Last spring I told him the condition that I'll stay: he gives me a hall pass (to cheat back) and buys me a VIP for my next birthday present. But not a VIP with some stripper, but a VIP with a particular rockstar who is well known to be promiscuous with groupie fans and has had open relationships/marriage for years now. A rockstar that I've been listening to and fawning over for over 20 years now, who my husband also listens to. A rockstar who, coincidentally, was on tour and coming to our city right before my next birthday. Darnit, if he could use household bill money to cheat with a stripper who's on the billboards, then I could have money spent to enable me to cheat back with someone even MORE successful than the stripper. I admit, my plan was to try and hook up, and my husband knew and accepted this. Yes, backstage VIP passes are very expensive, but so are strip club VIPs, so I feel entitled that he spend more money on me having this VIP than he spent on that stripper. He agreed. He had many months to start saving and purchase the tickets.

Well, he never followed through. I never even got to attend the concert, let alone get VIP passes to meet the rockstar, let alone hook up with him. I feel devalued and led on by this. I feel like he said yes just to appease me so I wouldn't leave him so late in my pregnancy. I feel like after what he did and with him agreeing I'd stay only on the condition that I get my hall pass VIP, that I'm still entitled to a hall pass. What would you do if you were me?