Bay Area - non big tech non finance salaries

[Anonymous]

I just went to see how much things cost in White Plains.

Sacramento is much more expensive than that.

Livermore, Campbell are possible if you get a very cheap 2 bd condo. You can however get a manufactured home in Campbell (good enough schools there) for 400k plus 1100/mo for the lot.

[Anonymous]

So now the current plan is we will move to Tracy or Sacramento, I'll spend the nights at the inlaws and head home for the weekends.

If DW can land a good job that boosts us enough to move closer, then we will move closer, otherwise this commute split will be it for a while.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So now the current plan is we will move to Tracy or Sacramento, I'll spend the nights at the inlaws and head home for the weekends.

If DW can land a good job that boosts us enough to move closer, then we will move closer, otherwise this commute split will be it for a while.

Wow that sounds miserable. How well do you get along with the in-laws? Does DW realize that she will see her parents slightly more but she and your children will lose out on tons of time with you and she will be solo parenting?

[Anonymous]

I know three families doing that now and who have been doing it for years.

Tracy would be a no on schools for me. Sacramento and other towns closer on 80 are on the capitol corridor amtrak route to San Jose.

[Anonymous]

And Sacramento is a mixed bag on schools be very careful there. Maybe look at Elk Grove if you aren't taking the train. From Elk Grove you would drive down through Stockton and then over from there. AcE train goes that way and BART does too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So now the current plan is we will move to Tracy or Sacramento, I'll spend the nights at the inlaws and head home for the weekends.

If DW can land a good job that boosts us enough to move closer, then we will move closer, otherwise this commute split will be it for a while.

Wow that sounds miserable. How well do you get along with the in-laws? Does DW realize that she will see her parents slightly more but she and your children will lose out on tons of time with you and she will be solo parenting?

Their kids aren't teens yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know three families doing that now and who have been doing it for years.

Tracy would be a no on schools for me. Sacramento and other towns closer on 80 are on the capitol corridor amtrak route to San Jose.

Oh wait but actually in all three cases, the husband stays with his parents, not his in-laws.

They are not visiting in laws on the weekends either, the kids' lives are in their town and the husband gets to see them at home on the weekend.

I know a mom who does this but she is flying to her family on Thursdays and she rents a room from someone for weekdays.

[Anonymous]

I would change gears and try to move to San Diego,op.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stupid decision. I assume you are a GS 15 and you’re giving that up for what exactly? To be near your in laws?

DW desperately misses California and now with COVID wants to be near family.

I know it’s trade offs. We will end up in townhouse in some suburbs, just trying to gauge strategy for salary b/c COL conversion makes it kinda ridiculous.

There are not that many townhouses in CA like there are here and suburbs close to tech centers are expensive. My brother is a FAANG programmer and he has a two BR condo in Sunnyvale he paid
1.5 m for.

There are a lot of townhouses in Fremont, Milpitas, San Jose, parts of Oakland. There are also a lot of garden style condos in plenty of suburbs that are basically townhouses. They are expensive, but what do you mean?

[Anonymous]

I guess I just thought, if there are nice places to live in the NYC metro, like White Plains, Long Island, NJ commuter rail towns, that are way more affordable, I thought something similar may exist in the Bay Area, and I was just clueless.

If you were working from home , I’d recommend Benicia. If you didn’t have kids AND you didn’t have that commute to the Peninsula, I’d recommend Pinole And El Sobrante. The latter aren’t exactly happening places but they’re in the Bay Area (East Bay) and they’re still affordable by Bay Area standards (you can have your 3BR on a relatively large 8000 SF lot for $750,000).

If all the above conditions were true AND you were looking to be a gentrifier, I’d recommend you spend 600k on a gorgeous old 5000 SF Victorian with original woodwork and leased glass in Vallejo (which now has a ferry direct to SF).

None of those conditions being true...

Castro Valley is the only place that comes to mind that could work for your job location (though the commute would still suck) and that has pretty good, not great, schools. I don’t know if you will be able to afford a house in the fancy area (budget 800k for that) but there are townhouses and condos there too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I guess I just thought, if there are nice places to live in the NYC metro, like White Plains, Long Island, NJ commuter rail towns, that are way more affordable, I thought something similar may exist in the Bay Area, and I was just clueless.

If you were working from home , I’d recommend Benicia. If you didn’t have kids AND you didn’t have that commute to the Peninsula, I’d recommend Pinole And El Sobrante. The latter aren’t exactly happening places but they’re in the Bay Area (East Bay) and they’re still affordable by Bay Area standards (you can have your 3BR on a relatively large 8000 SF lot for $750,000).

If all the above conditions were true AND you were looking to be a gentrifier, I’d recommend you spend 600k on a gorgeous old 5000 SF Victorian with original woodwork and leased glass in Vallejo (which now has a ferry direct to SF).

None of those conditions being true...

Castro Valley is the only place that comes to mind that could work for your job location (though the commute would still suck) and that has pretty good, not great, schools. I don’t know if you will be able to afford a house in the fancy area (budget 800k for that) but there are townhouses and condos there too.

I did not know about the ferry! Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And Sacramento is a mixed bag on schools be very careful there. Maybe look at Elk Grove if you aren't taking the train. From Elk Grove you would drive down through Stockton and then over from there. AcE train goes that way and BART does too.

I had a friend who lived in Elk Grove and she was miserable

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And Sacramento is a mixed bag on schools be very careful there. Maybe look at Elk Grove if you aren't taking the train. From Elk Grove you would drive down through Stockton and then over from there. AcE train goes that way and BART does too.

I had a friend who lived in Elk Grove and she was miserable

Why? I have friends who moved there who like it. Schools are a big relief to them. Elk grove isn't for me either but prices +good schools+nice houses means lots of people do like it.

[Anonymous]

So when will your wife see her family? She and the kids will be too far out to pop over for weeknight dinners and the kids will have homework. You will be living with your IN-LAWS all week and not helping your children adjust to a cross-country move. You will not be part of your new community in Tracy or Sacramento or wherever bc you will understandably just want to spend time with your wife and kids on the weekend. You are giving up a fed job, great schools, nice community for not that much more money in the highest COL area to hardly ever see your family. And your wife won’t be 20 minutes from
her parents. I think you will all be miserable and that you should seriously talk this decision through with a neutral third party.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So when will your wife see her family? She and the kids will be too far out to pop over for weeknight dinners and the kids will have homework. You will be living with your IN-LAWS all week and not helping your children adjust to a cross-country move. You will not be part of your new community in Tracy or Sacramento or wherever bc you will understandably just want to spend time with your wife and kids on the weekend. You are giving up a fed job, great schools, nice community for not that much more money in the highest COL area to hardly ever see your family. And your wife won’t be 20 minutes from
her parents. I think you will all be miserable and that you should seriously talk this decision through with a neutral third party.

And to move to a job in a tech company in a declining industry!!!! As though layoffs don't happen. I can't imagine taking that risk. Get a nanny and send your wife to stay with her parents for two months. You will come out way ahead financially.