Advice for divorcing narcissistic husband?

[Anonymous]

Anyone care to share any advice? He likes to do battle. I prefer to avoid battles when possible. Other than 'get the best lawyer possible' what advice helped you in this kind of situation?

[Anonymous]

No shortage of sociopathic narcissist men. What advice? Get a lawyer, and get out.

[Anonymous]

Don't engage with him. It will just fuel the fire. Sign nothing he gives you.

[Anonymous]

Don't bother with mediation, go straight to court. It will save you time, energy and money in the long run.

[Anonymous]

Change your phone number, email, move (to another continent), you know, basic stuff.

[Anonymous]

Recommend this book:

Splitting: Protecting yourself while divorcing someone with a borderline or narcissistic personality disorder.

If you find it helpful please pass it long. It's a nightmare to go through this with a normal person. BPD and NPD make it quadruple hell.

[Anonymous]

Following this thread. I am also getting ready to divorce my narcissistic husband! I have no advice to offer. I am preparing for battle myself! Good luck OP

[Anonymous]

Don't fuel the fire and respond to the hysteria, bullshit, guilt trip, subterfuge, blame shifting or whatever bait he dangles to get the upper hand. Stay one step ahead. Keep rational and cool headed. Manipulate him by flattery/keeping the peace, and keep your eyes on the prize. Protect your kids and your assets and get out. Run for the hills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't fuel the fire and respond to the hysteria, bullshit, guilt trip, subterfuge, blame shifting or whatever bait he dangles to get the upper hand. Stay one step ahead. Keep rational and cool headed. Manipulate him by flattery/keeping the peace, and keep your eyes on the prize. Protect your kids and your assets and get out. Run for the hills.

This! Stay cool, be uber-organized. Manipulate. It's a miserable game but you can win.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't fuel the fire and respond to the hysteria, bullshit, guilt trip, subterfuge, blame shifting or whatever bait he dangles to get the upper hand. Stay one step ahead. Keep rational and cool headed. Manipulate him by flattery/keeping the peace, and keep your eyes on the prize. Protect your kids and your assets and get out. Run for the hills.

This! Stay cool, be uber-organized. Manipulate. It's a miserable game but you can win.

The only way you win is to move on. These types have a scorched earth approach where no one wins.

[Anonymous]

I agree with all the above and the moving name change if possible.

I think doing what you can to keep his ego in tact will be exceptionally valuable to you. His ego and attachment system are going to possibly go wild. Any validation and compassion you can give will likely help...

[Anonymous]

Get the kids out of the DMV quickly. These courts support these types. Before he files.

[Anonymous]

Good luck honey.

[Anonymous]

Do you have children?

Document everything. Narcissists will create their own narrative about what happened in a divorce, often featuring themselves prominently as a perpetually wronged victim. Set firm dates to split up household items, have a neutral third party there with you, and don't engage in the drama.

[Anonymous]

It's going to be painful but will be so worth it in the end!!!