Late Twenties DH is SO BORING!

[Anonymous]

My late twenties DH is so boring I feel like we are 50 years old already. I wanted for us to go to Paris for my birthday in March but he turned the idea down saying we do not have the money for a trip at this time. He also does not like to go out or party or socialize much. His ideal evening is to come home and plop down in front of his computer to play a video game.

I'm losing my mind. I want us to enjoy our remaining youth and have fun and adventures before we have children!

What do I do?

[Anonymous]

leave him or start seeing someone who is more alpha

[Anonymous]

Maybe you could pay for the trip to Paris out of your own money?

[Anonymous]

Now is a good time to have kids. You are getting old.

[Anonymous]

So what did you love about him that you married him? Also you can go on fun trips without him too you know.
You can have fun in your 30s with kids too but you have to have energy and a go go attitude. I have friend who have flown multiple times a year with their ES and younger kids on vacations and go on hikes regularly. This isn't just about your 20s, this is about how you want to spend time together. You guys need to sort that out before resentment sets in. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:leave him or start seeing someone who is more alpha

Alpha are not fun. Everything happens behind their backs.

[Anonymous]

maybe he's focused on saving for your future and worried about your spend thrift ways jeopardizing the life he wants to build and share with you.

maybe you should think about his interests or suggest to find something new that the 2 of you can share together - you know, something that's not just about you.

[Anonymous]

So when did he change...because he wasn't like that before you married him, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My late twenties DH is so boring I feel like we are 50 years old already. I wanted for us to go to Paris for my birthday in March but he turned the idea down saying we do not have the money for a trip at this time. He also does not like to go out or party or socialize much. His ideal evening is to come home and plop down in front of his computer to play a video game.

I'm losing my mind. I want us to enjoy our remaining youth and have fun and adventures before we have children!

What do I do?

Don't have children. You sound way to immature.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]My late twenties DH is so boring I feel like we are 50 years old already. I wanted for us to go to Paris for my birthday in March but he turned the idea down saying we do not have the money for a trip at this time. He also does not like to go out or party or socialize much. His ideal evening is to come home and plop down in front of his computer to play a video game.

I'm losing my mind. I want us to enjoy our remaining youth and have fun and adventures before we have children!

What do I do?[/quote]

Ok so not Paris. It's not "expensive European trip" vs staying at home in front of a screen. There are things in between. Day trips to parks, museums, bar with friends to watch the game. Skiing, hiking, ice skating at the sculpture garden etc. Talk to him that you want to go DO things together and then find out what makes sense budget and time wise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:leave him or start seeing someone who is more alpha

Terrible idea.....Have you told him your getting bored? As a DH who has gone through this before it might just be that he doesn't really think about it. You are married, he probably just kind of let things slip in the energy department. I did this not on purpose but because I was happy. I am more introverted and was feeling like I was getting everything I needed through what I was doing and my relationship, not recognizing that my wife was not, she was always much more sociable. She told me and I was able to recognize what she needed to feel happy, which was different than me but just as valid. Just tell him that you would like to do more interesting things, go out more, hang out with friends more etc. Tell him you would like to do more stuff and would like for him to be more active in your relationship. He will probably step up if you do it in a positive way, not that you are bored with him but would like to do more exciting things together. Have sex a lot, make him feel like a star when he does take initiative to do more stuff and frames your relationship in the way that you want him to. Chances are if you tell him, make him feel like a kick ass guy and have sex with him he'll come around.

[Anonymous]

Did he used to enjoy partying and socializing? And I mean really enjoy it, not just tolerate it because you wanted to do it? If he's changed that significantly, I'd be concerned about his mental health. If this is how he's always been, well, that's how he is and you have to decide if you can live with it.

I don't have a whole lot of sympathy on the Paris thing, though. If the extra money's not there, it's not there, and it's foolish to rack up debt just so you can say you went to Paris for your birthday.

[Anonymous]

Start doing what you want to do. Invite him along. Either he'll catch up or he won't

[Anonymous]

My ex was like that, all he wanted to do was play video games or attend concerts that I didn't give a shit about. We get divorced and all of a sudden he does all the things he never did with me.

Do whatever you want, BUT, make sure you live your life for you.. Don't wait on him. You want to go to Paris for your birthday, and you can afford it? Do it. Fuck him.

[Anonymous]

Men, please don't play video games on a regular basis, unless your SO also loves to play with you. This is such a turn off.

OP, sit down and talk with him. Maybe compromise. Maybe you guys could go out every other weekend, and he can play his games on the off weekends.

As for Paris, if you don't have the money, then you should probably wait and save for it. Maybe go some place cheaper?