My ex husband is INFURIATING

[Anonymous]

OP, your ex sounds like mine. He wants me to drive our DC to his place (2 hrs away) and then come back the next day to pick him up. He has to work the whole time so our DC will just "hang out at work" with him. He doesn't exactly work in a safe office environment either so our DC could get hurt. He wonders what my problem is why I won't agree to this. He says "It will give you some time to yourself." Let's see. It is a 4 hr round-trip on one day and another 4 hr round-trip the next. Hmmm. No thanks. When I get angry, I tell him that our child is not a pizza and I won't be delivering him. Lame I know but he really does think he is doing me a huge favor by taking him off my hands for less than 24 hrs.

[Anonymous]

"Sorry, but I'm tired of listening to women whine about their useless husbands. One of my close girlfriends is falling apart because she just had #2, and her husband isn't helping at all. He's MIA - working 70-80 hours a week, golfing on the weekends, not waking up either weekend day. She's miserable.

The thing is she admits he was like this with #1. Yet she's surprised he's not helping with #2. Which they planned.

WTF? Sorry you are miserable, but what were you THINKING?"

The level of your empathy amazes me - you must be a truly caring and supportive friend. Give yourself a pat on the back for that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

No. I'm not divorced. I'm happily married. Before having our first child, I told my husband we'd have to do it 50-50. Evenly share responsibilities, including daycare drop off and pick up, sick days, baths, cooking, laundry, EVERYTHING.

He kept his end of the deal. So we had another one. He's still keeping his end of the deal. The thing is, it wasn't rocket science. If he hadn't kept his end of the bargain, there would not have been another child. How hard is that for you to understand?

So many stupid, STUPID women continue to have babies with men that are completely useless assholes. And you wonder why your lives are miserable. Well, it is because you made a dumb ass decision, and now you have to live with it.

SHUT THE FUCK UP BECAUSE I'M TIRED OF LISTENING TO WOMEN LIKE YOU BITCH AND MOAN ABOUT THE MESSES YOU HAVE GOTTEN YOURSELVES INTO.

Maybe next time, keep your legs closed to assholes.

*Applause!*

Someone with a brain! I like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the 20:03 PP. That was my first post on this thread. My husband is a fabulous father and partner so I'm not complaining. I just meant that your post made you sound like a very boring, controlling, self-righteous nag with an uninteresting sex life, but I guess that went over your head.

Where in the world did you get nag out of her post? Because she and her husband agreed to split responsibilities in half?

It's sad that women can be the biggest misogynists around. You are calling her a controlling, self-righteous nag (language loaded with sexism) because she wants her husband to put in equal work? Wow.

She didn't say she withholds sex if he doesn't do his "chores." She said if he were to slack off on contributing to the household, she wouldn't add another baby to the mix. That sounds downright responsible to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I'm the 20:03 PP. That was my first post on this thread. My husband is a fabulous father and partner so I'm not complaining. I just meant that your post made you sound like a very boring, controlling, self-righteous nag with an uninteresting sex life, but I guess that went over your head.

Where in the world did you get nag out of her post? Because she and her husband agreed to split responsibilities in half?

It's sad that women can be the biggest misogynists around. You are calling her a controlling, self-righteous nag (language loaded with sexism) because she wants her husband to put in equal work? Wow.

She didn't say she withholds sex if he doesn't do his "chores." She said if he were to slack off on contributing to the household, she wouldn't add another baby to the mix. That sounds downright responsible to me.

PP here. That's just the thing I don't get. I don't have to nag my husband. I don't have to ask him every single day to do his share around the house, or his share of parenting. He just does it.

I do not understand women that can't even comprehend a marriage that has this kind of equality. It is really sad that so many women seem to think the only way to have a decent, respectful, sharing parenting relationship is for the wife to be a "boring controlling self-righteous nag with unintersting sex life."

Really ladies, you deserve more. There are good men out there, and you owe it to yourselves to find one. Stop settling for these idiots. And if you got yourself into one of these bad relationships for whatever reason, for the love of God stop after just 1 child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Sorry, but I'm tired of listening to women whine about their useless husbands. One of my close girlfriends is falling apart because she just had #2, and her husband isn't helping at all. He's MIA - working 70-80 hours a week, golfing on the weekends, not waking up either weekend day. She's miserable.

The thing is she admits he was like this with #1. Yet she's surprised he's not helping with #2. Which they planned.

WTF? Sorry you are miserable, but what were you THINKING?"

The level of your empathy amazes me - you must be a truly caring and supportive friend. Give yourself a pat on the back for that.

empathy != agreeing with all of someone's choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are good men out there, and you owe it to yourselves to find one.

Yeah, but they are all short and/or balding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The answer is NO. I am not driving forty minutes to the BBQ with our two children. The BBQ where you will be volunteering, drinking and hanging around with your buddies in the pit, while I chase our children around in a public park. Just like every event when we were married.

NO I am not going to take our three year old so that she misses her nap. Because the consequences of her missing her nap will suck for her, and me, and her sister. But not for you since YOU DON'T ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILDREN.

And yes I am sure it WOULD be nice for your new girl friend and her kids to be able to play with our kids at this event. You know what? I don't give a shit! I am not going to spend the day hanging around with your girlfriend and her kids at the park. I'm sure she's a lovely woman but I'd rather spend the day getting my teeth pulled, thank you.

And the answer was no the first time you asked, and the second time, and the third. Repeatedly subjecting someone to unwanted pressure and intimidation because you want them to do something is called HARASSMENT. I hung up on you tonight. I will do it EVERY time you pull this crap.

Having me take care of the kids while you have fun is not actually "visitation". When you have visitation with your kids YOU are supposed to spend time with them and take care of them.

Vent over.

Seems like your ex just has a more laid-back attitude towards parenting than you do. Is there a reason you can't just drop the kids off, or have him pick the kids up at a midway point?

And if he's been dating this girl for a while, she's going to be in the kids' life, whether you like it or not.