unmarried mother - who has custody

[Anonymous]

An unmarried mother has had full physical custody of kids for many years. Couple lived together, engaged but never married with children, then split up. Father never filed in court for any kind of visitation or custody, although he did acknowledge parenthood on birth certificates. Mother has always facilitated his involvement with kids -- visitation, mutually agreed upon child support, etc.

Child-raising has been done without court involvement by mutual agreement and father has always ceded the lead on major decisions to mother. Question is who can be said to have official "legal custody" in this situation? My impression is an unmarried mother is the only one with legal custody until Dad files in court. Agree or disagree?

Please note -- this is NOT a question about what kind of involvement or custody the father does or should have. I'll stipulate that the father would probably get some kind of legal and perhaps even some physical custody if he filed for it and that fathers should be involved. The question is just a technical, legal one -- who has custody of children of an unmarried mother if neither parent has filed in court?

[Anonymous]

Depends on the state, but usually the mother. There will still be trouble with getting certain things like passports without some official documentation that clearly outlines custody.

[Anonymous]

In VA, it's assumed joint legal unless a court order says otherwise. I'm in the same situation and that's what my lawyer said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the state, but usually the mother. There will still be trouble with getting certain things like passports without some official documentation that clearly outlines custody.

I am in the same situation OP and I don't have an answer either. But as far as I understand, both parents, regardless of custody, need to either be present to apply for a passport or the NCP needs to sign a form giving permission for the CP to apply for a passport.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In VA, it's assumed joint legal unless a court order says otherwise. I'm in the same situation and that's what my lawyer said.

If dad is on BC.

[Anonymous]

It's up to the mother to list the father's name on the BC. I bet she did not do that.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the info about passports, but this question isn't about that. I'm simply asking if an unmarried father will automatically have joint legal custody of a child without ever having filed for such through the court. As I stated previously, father signed birth certificates.

One PP says in VA both unmarried parents are presumed to have joint legal custody even if no court papers have ever been filed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the info about passports, but this question isn't about that. I'm simply asking if an unmarried father will automatically have joint legal custody of a child without ever having filed for such through the court. As I stated previously, father signed birth certificates.

One PP says in VA both unmarried parents are presumed to have joint legal custody even if no court papers have ever been filed.

Meant to ask -- any other states? DC? MD?

[Anonymous]

A court order must be entered to clarify the custody agreement. Courts make no presumption, but should you have to litigate, you have a better case for primary custody (but not necessarily sole legal). Why do you ask?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the info about passports, but this question isn't about that. I'm simply asking if an unmarried father will automatically have joint legal custody of a child without ever having filed for such through the court. As I stated previously, father signed birth certificates.

One PP says in VA both unmarried parents are presumed to have joint legal custody even if no court papers have ever been filed.

Meant to ask -- any other states? DC? MD?

What state are you in? It's pretty easy to look up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the info about passports, but this question isn't about that. I'm simply asking if an unmarried father will automatically have joint legal custody of a child without ever having filed for such through the court. As I stated previously, father signed birth certificates.

One PP says in VA both unmarried parents are presumed to have joint legal custody even if no court papers have ever been filed.

Meant to ask -- any other states? DC? MD?

What state are you in? It's pretty easy to look up.

What's easy to look up is the law about determination of custody once a custody filing is made.

It's also easy to understand what happens with a married couple -- the child are presumed to be joint legal custody prior to filing.

What is less clear to me is who has legal custody prior to or in the absence of any custody filing to the court by either of the unmarried parties. Many states consider the child of an unmarried mother to be her child (and thus in her legal custody) until the father acknowledges paternity AND files for custody in court. But I am not sure about MD and DC (another poster posted the advice she got in VA).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the info about passports, but this question isn't about that. I'm simply asking if an unmarried father will automatically have joint legal custody of a child without ever having filed for such through the court. As I stated previously, father signed birth certificates.

One PP says in VA both unmarried parents are presumed to have joint legal custody even if no court papers have ever been filed.

Meant to ask -- any other states? DC? MD?

What state are you in? It's pretty easy to look up.

What's easy to look up is the law about determination of custody once a custody filing is made.

It's also easy to understand what happens with a married couple -- the child are presumed to be joint legal custody prior to filing.

What is less clear to me is who has legal custody prior to or in the absence of any custody filing to the court by either of the unmarried parties. Many states consider the child of an unmarried mother to be her child (and thus in her legal custody) until the father acknowledges paternity AND files for custody in court. But I am not sure about MD and DC (another poster posted the advice she got in VA).

Well I was offering to look it up for you, but I only felt like doing it once. Not going to do it for both states, since it's your domicile that will control.

[Anonymous]

Nobody has custody, legal or physical. If there is no custody order, nobody has custody. That means, passports per the State Department, has to be signed by both parents. If Mom had sole legal custody, then passports signed by her only. If had joint legal custody, then passports signed by both.

Since there is no legal custody, both parties can do whatever they want with the children re: school, therapy, etc. It would be up to the schools, therapists, whatever as to what their policy is if one parent objects.

[Anonymous]

Unless stated in court, then it's joint custody.

[Anonymous]

So the last 2 PPs contradict each other. What does the state of MD say?