oldest or youngest in your grade - how did it impact YOU?

[Anonymous]

If you were one of the oldest or youngest in your grade growing up, how do you think it impacted you? I'm curious to hear about other's experiences.

I'll start: I was one of the oldest (Jan birthday with a Dec 31st cutoff). I did great in school, was a "leader" in many ways (but not athletics - that was a lost cause!), and went to a top college. In many ways, I don't think being the oldest was great for me though. I never had to work very hard, and got used to coasting through life, which I think is to my detriment now as it's hard to shake the expectation that I can excel with a minimal investment of effort. Socially, I did okay (particularly in the older grades), but definitely had a few rough patches when I didn't fit in well with the kids in my class. I was a pretty mature kid to begin with, and also pretty bright, so "the gift of time" didn't necessarily work in my favor.

[Anonymous]

I was the youngest (Dec. bday, don't know cut-off), but I was without question always the youngest. It didn't affect me at all, so far as I can tell. I really don't think is such a big deal, but apparently some people think do, given the number of threads on red-shirting and all that.

[Anonymous]

I had pretty much your same exact experience with a February birthday/Dec 31 cut off. I had lots of friends who were fall birthdays (so youngest, starting K at age 4). Many of them have done very well, went to great colleges, socially popular, good at sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had pretty much your same exact experience with a February birthday/Dec 31 cut off. I had lots of friends who were fall birthdays (so youngest, starting K at age 4). Many of them have done very well, went to great colleges, socially popular, good at sports.

I meant I had the same experience as OP.

[Anonymous]

My brother was the oldest in his class (not because of redshirting, but because his birthday was right after the cut-off). It was good for him throughout elementary school because he was on the late side of being able to use the toilet independently and reliably and in learning to read, but by middle school/high school he was tremendously bored academically. He struggled socially until high school, when it was easier to make friends with older kids. He ended up graduating high school a year early and going to a top college. He initially struggled in college because he had never needed to learn study skills/time management skills, but ended up doing great in college and professionally.

[Anonymous]

I was always the youngest, and I did fine. No academic problems, no social problems (except for the age-appropriate ones).

[Anonymous]

I was always the youngest girl with my birthday being July 31, right before August 1 cutoff. I had absolutely no problems grades wise or keeping up with other kids. I never played sports so that wasn't a factor.

I just never thought about being the youngest really...

[Anonymous]

I went to a multi-age/grade Montessori until 4th grade. After that, public school where I was one of the youngest... no biggie.

Another girl in my grade who was almost 2 years younger than the cutoff (she was from Scotland, and arrived in the US starting in 4th grade, too). And yet another who was a full year younger--as it turned out, she actually was brilliant, but her parents didn't want her skipping all sorts of grades to go to college very early--they wanted her to have friends, etc.

Note all the really young ones I mentioned were girls.

My father was held back a year back in the dark ages for the stupid reason that he had poor spelling (he was home schooled until 3rd grade). After that, he said he was more mature and more serious "about life" than other kids in his grade, even in college--though the reason for this might be a combo of his temperament and the fact that he had some pretty major family and work responsibilities starting at a young age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was the youngest (Dec. bday, don't know cut-off), but I was without question always the youngest. It didn't affect me at all, so far as I can tell. I really don't think is such a big deal, but apparently some people think do, given the number of threads on red-shirting and all that.

I was one of the youngest in HS with a birthday around Thanksgiving in HS with a Dec 31st cutoff. Two of my bfs, one is a Jan birthday (oldest) and the other had an after Christmas birthday (youngest). We were all NMSF and two of us went Ivy and one went to a SLAC. All went to top 5 law schools. I don't think being the youngest or oldest made any difference.

[Anonymous]

I was always the youngest. Started school at 4, learned to read then. Graduated at 17 and started college at 17. Published in an academic journal and graduated college at 21. Started grad school then got doctorate at 26 and purchased my first home then too.

and I was mildly popular. I'm now the VP of a Dc based non-profit and make crazy money after a childhood marred by poverty.

[Anonymous]

I was always one of the youngest (early Sept birthday), and I definitely think it affected me as far as confidence, etc. I was always very strong academically, which is why my parents let me go on instead of holding back, but emotionally and developmentally I was immature. Very shy. Not assertive. Afraid to participate or speak up. Was often bulllied. I think having waited a year would have made a big difference for me developmentally with confidence levels.

[Anonymous]

My brothers and I (triplets) were among the youngest (birthday in december). One brother had a lisp and went to speech class in early elementary school.

We all graduated from good colleges, didn't struggle in school, and are happy in life. Being among the youngest was simply not an issue.

[Anonymous]

I was the youngest (Dec birthday) until a boy skipped a grade in HS and joined our class. I graduated top 10%, was in NHS and did fine socially. My BF had a January birthday and I didn't mind asking her for a ride when I couldn't drive, but she could. It was fine entering college at 17 and graduating at 21.

[Anonymous]

I was the youngest, by a lot. (Started school early with a late December birthday.) Academically, it was the right thing--I was bored in class and school was always really easy for me, even with the early start--but socially it was hard (I was a naturally shy kid, and being younger didn't help) and athletically that year difference definitely mattered. But, given my personality and temperament, I don't think I was ever going to be outgoing and socially confident and popular, even if I wasn't the youngest, so I'm not sure how much it mattered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you were one of the oldest or youngest in your grade growing up, how do you think it impacted you? I'm curious to hear about other's experiences.

I'll start: I was one of the oldest (Jan birthday with a Dec 31st cutoff). I did great in school, was a "leader" in many ways (but not athletics - that was a lost cause!), and went to a top college. In many ways, I don't think being the oldest was great for me though. I never had to work very hard, and got used to coasting through life, which I think is to my detriment now as it's hard to shake the expectation that I can excel with a minimal investment of effort. Socially, I did okay (particularly in the older grades), but definitely had a few rough patches when I didn't fit in well with the kids in my class. I was a pretty mature kid to begin with, and also pretty bright, so "the gift of time" didn't necessarily work in my favor.

That's funny, OP. I could have written your post except substitute "youngest" for "oldest" and "immature" for "mature." Academics were easy for me, which I suppose means it's good I wasn't held back a year bc it would have possibly been even easier. Socially I did fine but like you, struggled at times. Framing it in terms of age, I think my immaturity could have played into it. Or else it was just who I was. This conversation about redshirting makes us look back and think everything that happened was somehow a function of our relative age in the peer group. But I don't think it's nearly that simple.