Would you hold child back a grade in this situation?

[Anonymous]

I would not hold back

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To answer your question OP, I wouldn't. Then your kid would be 18 months younger than everyone else?? That's just a lot. So no.

Op here. I’m sorry what do you mean? He is currently the youngest in his class by up to a year. If we held him back a year he’d be, at most, a month or two older than the oldest kid in the class (assuming no redshirting).

[Anonymous]

“ Based on national average statistics, most children educated in a British style are a year or more ahead of their US counterparts in math and language. ”

https://www.nordangliaeducation.com/nais-new-york/news/2020/10/29/british-school-system-vs-american

[Anonymous]

I'd ask the school where you're moving to place him appropriately for his age and skill level. Bring work samples.

[Anonymous]

NO!

[Anonymous]

Indian?

[Anonymous]

Were you or the other parent of the child late bloomers? How are they socially and size wise?

I have two kids. Both summer birthdays. One is academically advanced, like 2 grades ahead. The other is just above average. Both are late bloomers, even with the summer birthday. They were also on the smaller side all through ES to 15 yrs old when they finally hit puberty and had a growth spurt.

We did not redshirt either children, but from a social/emotional/physical perspective, I think redshirting would've been beneficial for both.

Academically, the advanced DC would absolutely not have benefited from redshirting. They were already so far ahead; if we had redshirted them, they'd have been even more bored at school.

In hindsight, we should've redshirted the other child who has an August birthday. They were fine academically, but they lagged behind everywhere else, and it impacted their school experience.

I never thought about how the possibility of being a late bloomer would impact them. Both my spouse and I were late bloomers; my spouse was held back a year when they moved (spouse is actually British); I was not. Academically, I was fine, did really well, but I was small for my age, and it was difficult emotionally and socially.

It's hard to know how your kids will be when they are older, but if there is a chance that your child will hit puberty later, and they don't need advanced academics right now, I would seriously think about holding them back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait…your kid is currently in a school in the US and he is NOT being tested on his ability to read in English , but in then “immersion” language?

Sorry, but that is stupid and why would you be ok with this?

Op here. It’s an immersion school. Public. The research they have shared with us is that by the end of elementary, they will be reading in both languages on grade level. The skill set reading in the target language transfers to English.

In our state they do the standardized tests in the target language.

It’s a public school. They aren’t required to do standardized tests of core subjects in English?

Not OP but this is how full immersion schools work. A lot of them are 100% the foreign language until 2nd or 3rd grade. He is not at a grade yet where they do standardized testing. They start adding in English when they do the standardized testing and yes kids are generally slowed to catch up with english reading/writing. It is just something you make peace with if you want immersion for your kid.

My friend's kid is at 100% French immersion school (not in teh area). She is in 2nd and essentially fluent in french (she can read, write, and speak it). She will start learning to read in English next year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Were you or the other parent of the child late bloomers? How are they socially and size wise?

I have two kids. Both summer birthdays. One is academically advanced, like 2 grades ahead. The other is just above average. Both are late bloomers, even with the summer birthday. They were also on the smaller side all through ES to 15 yrs old when they finally hit puberty and had a growth spurt.

We did not redshirt either children, but from a social/emotional/physical perspective, I think redshirting would've been beneficial for both.

Academically, the advanced DC would absolutely not have benefited from redshirting. They were already so far ahead; if we had redshirted them, they'd have been even more bored at school.

In hindsight, we should've redshirted the other child who has an August birthday. They were fine academically, but they lagged behind everywhere else, and it impacted their school experience.

I never thought about how the possibility of being a late bloomer would impact them. Both my spouse and I were late bloomers; my spouse was held back a year when they moved (spouse is actually British); I was not. Academically, I was fine, did really well, but I was small for my age, and it was difficult emotionally and socially.

It's hard to know how your kids will be when they are older, but if there is a chance that your child will hit puberty later, and they don't need advanced academics right now, I would seriously think about holding them back.

Op here. He is very large for his age which is why we did not redshirt (one of the reasons anyway). DH and I are both over 6 ft.

I was extremely advanced academically throughout school. Like I took the SAT when I was 9, skipped multiple grades, and graduated college as a teen. DH was a super late bloomer academically and never bloomed socially lol.

I’ll admit I kind of thought DS was going to be super smart but most evidence points to him being very average. The only indicator that he might be above average is he does have a high EQ and ability to read people/empathize which his 1st and 2nd grade teachers pointed out and said is unusual. But IQ tests have shown him as very average.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“ Based on national average statistics, most children educated in a British style are a year or more ahead of their US counterparts in math and language. ”

https://www.nordangliaeducation.com/nais-new-york/news/2020/10/29/british-school-system-vs-american

+1. PPs aren't considering the differences between the British and American educational systems. In the UK, a child turning 8 in August would be in Year 3, which is the first year of key stage 2, where they move beyond foundational instruction in phonics and math. Not only does the British system start a year earlier, but it also moves MUCH faster in the early years. If he's a little behind in the US, he'll be much more behind in the UK system. If I were OP, I'd see if he could get an independent assessment and see where he is academically for the UK before deciding to put him in Year 4 next year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom kept me one year behind while changing schools and it worked against me in a way. In each class, in each grade, I was a year+ older than everyone else and as we grew up, kids around me made me conscious about my age. That increased as we hit teens. While everyone was taking up a full time job by by age 21, I was almost 23. Just always mad me feel "old".
Academically though, I did great at school.

Everyone you know graduated college at 21? Doubt that. I have a summer birthday and was 22 when I graduated, in 4 years, as expected.

NP. If you have a summer birthday and graduated college at 22, then your college must have had a really late end of the spring semester? Not sure how it’s possible otherwise. I have a July birthday, and I graduated college in May when I was 21. I was also 17 when I graduated high school in June (turned 18 a month or so later).

[Anonymous]

I would talk to the new school and see what they recommend. Maybe they’ll test him before making their recommendation. My sister and her family are expats and when they first moved abroad one of their kids got “held back”. I think he may have been behind in math but possibly also reading (this was also early elementary). Not a British system though.

[Anonymous]

We did this in the reverse. We moved to DC from abroad. My kid would have been on the younger side in DC with a late August birthday. We enrolled her in 1st grade when she could have technically been in 2nd, so now she's one of the oldest in her class. It's worked well for us. She got to chill for a year academically but it gave her time to make friends, work on social skills and get used to a new school system.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Were you or the other parent of the child late bloomers? How are they socially and size wise?

I have two kids. Both summer birthdays. One is academically advanced, like 2 grades ahead. The other is just above average. Both are late bloomers, even with the summer birthday. They were also on the smaller side all through ES to 15 yrs old when they finally hit puberty and had a growth spurt.

We did not redshirt either children, but from a social/emotional/physical perspective, I think redshirting would've been beneficial for both.

Academically, the advanced DC would absolutely not have benefited from redshirting. They were already so far ahead; if we had redshirted them, they'd have been even more bored at school.

In hindsight, we should've redshirted the other child who has an August birthday. They were fine academically, but they lagged behind everywhere else, and it impacted their school experience.

I never thought about how the possibility of being a late bloomer would impact them. Both my spouse and I were late bloomers; my spouse was held back a year when they moved (spouse is actually British); I was not. Academically, I was fine, did really well, but I was small for my age, and it was difficult emotionally and socially.

It's hard to know how your kids will be when they are older, but if there is a chance that your child will hit puberty later, and they don't need advanced academics right now, I would seriously think about holding them back.

Op here. He is very large for his age which is why we did not redshirt (one of the reasons anyway). DH and I are both over 6 ft.

I was extremely advanced academically throughout school. Like I took the SAT when I was 9, skipped multiple grades, and graduated college as a teen. DH was a super late bloomer academically and never bloomed socially lol.

I’ll admit I kind of thought DS was going to be super smart but most evidence points to him being very average. The only indicator that he might be above average is he does have a high EQ and ability to read people/empathize which his 1st and 2nd grade teachers pointed out and said is unusual. But IQ tests have shown him as very average.

In this case, I would not redshirt. He is large for his age already. If you redshirt, he will be even larger than his peers.

Average academics is fine. His advanced EQ will get him far.