Bristol Palin pregnancy - the discussion I'd love to see (long)

[Anonymous]

Let me start by saying - the purpose of this post is not to judge Sarah Palin on either her daughter's pregnancy or her choices about her fifth child and how she is meeting her obligations for that child (or any of her other children).

What I'd love to see, and I truly don't know if this is realistic or not (probably not), is the following acknowledgement from various media outlets and political figures:

The recent high profile pregnancies of Bristol Palin and Jamie Lynn Spears are not, in any way, representative of the typical teenage mother pregnancy. Jamie Lynn Spears is already a teen-aged entertainer with a proven means of self-provided financial support. Bristol Palin is a member of a family with the financial means to provide the support necessary to raise an infant, regardless of her personal ability to do so. Both young women are members of families who have expressed a desire to assist these young women with raising their babies. Many teenaged parent's do not have these resources available - they are limited by the age and education, and the tremendous burden on the parent, and associated risk to the child, is not what Ms. Spears and Ms. Palin are facing. Many teenaged mothers do not have financially stable and supportive families to help them.
Teenage pregnancy is NOT a positive. Humans are sexual beings and the sexual urges begin at puberty, which makes it hard to resist (come on please and be honest about this). Yes, abstinence is the ONLY guaranteed method of avoiding a pregnancy - abstinence is the best course of action. Those people who urge abstinence usually are adults with kids of their own - because we know about the whole cycle and have weighed the results of sex, the costs of STDs and kids, against the pleasure of sex. Teenagers haven't. They don't get it because they haven't lived it. Given that teenagers should be given tools to assist them with staying abstinent, or tools to avoid the negative consequences often associated with unprotected sex. You can't control a teenager and what they do with their body, and Sarah Palin should not be judged on her daughter's actions. But, surely, now even Mrs. Palin can see that more should be done to look carefully at all the sex education programs out there and figure out a way to really drive home the point that if you have sex, the consequences can be far beyond anything you can imagine, and then equip our teens with the tools necessary to make a informed choice one way or another.

To applaud Bristol Palin's choice to keep her child, and publicize it as a positive without acknowledging the fact that this is a totally atypical situation seems irresponsible of those people who are doing so.

Am I crazy for being disappointed that no one is mentioning this?

[Anonymous]

Are people really applauding Bristol Palin's decision to keep her baby or are they applauding her decision not to terminate the pregnancy? Obviously since that is her decision, we can never know. But, the way I've been viewing it is that people are supporting her decision not to terminate and would do the same were she to have decided to give up the child for adoption. You are right though, that neither she nor Jamie Lynn Spears will face the kinds of difficulties that middle and lower class Americans would face in their shoes.

[Anonymous]

I try to tell my DS13 that sex is like fire. Yes, it's beautiful, it's wonderful, it serves a purpose, people like it, you get the idea... But, nobody likes uncontrolled fires. They're dangerous and cause harm. Everyone wants a fire in their fireplace, but it's dangerous to have them in the kitchen or garage. Point being, to control the urges and direct them rather than being reckless. Yes, the ideal would be to wait until marriage b/c that's what my religion teaches. Kudos to those who wait that long. My second choice would be that he wait until he's mature enough to be responsible and to love the woman he's having sex with and to be in a committed relationship. What I'm afraid of is teen pregnancy or STD's. I agree with the PP's who've made it clear teens will do what they want to do. The time to do your work as a parent is from age 5 through teenage years, not starting at 15!

I've only seen one teen couple make it into their 40's, both staying married AND becoming millionaires. Funny, but now my cousin doesn't have a leg to stand on when her kids ask about sex before marriage or 'why can't I marry him before I go to college, Mom?'. But, I have to say many, many more teen marriages I know from high school and college have failed, which only makes sense.

It's almost impossible to knock this kind of life sense into their heads in their teens though. I know I thought I knew it all. The key is education and birth control. Hope for the best and plan for the worst.

[Anonymous]

I want to know if she;s going to give the baby a crazy name or something more traditional

[Anonymous]

I still don't understand why no one has talked about adoption in Miss Bristol Bay's case. Clearly, that would be the best choice for everyone involved, especially the baby....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I still don't understand why no one has talked about adoption in Miss Bristol Bay's case. Clearly, that would be the best choice for everyone involved, especially the baby....

How do you know what they discussed? Are you a Palin family insider?

Why is it clearly the best choice? If her mom is launched into the white house those children and grandchildren will have ALL of the opportunity in the world, not to mention a "brigade" of help around the house (unless of course Palin fires the chef and housekeepers). This will be a piece of cake for Bristol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
To applaud Bristol Palin's choice to keep her child, and publicize it as a positive without acknowledging the fact that this is a totally atypical situation seems irresponsible of those people who are doing so.

Am I crazy for being disappointed that no one is mentioning this?

I'm sorry. I just really don't see that Bristol Palin's pregnancy is any of our business. But then I don't buy into the celebrity culture that seems to pervade every aspect of American society, including our political discourse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
To applaud Bristol Palin's choice to keep her child, and publicize it as a positive without acknowledging the fact that this is a totally atypical situation seems irresponsible of those people who are doing so.

Am I crazy for being disappointed that no one is mentioning this?

I'm sorry. I just really don't see that Bristol Palin's pregnancy is any of our business. But then I don't buy into the celebrity culture that seems to pervade every aspect of American society, including our political discourse.

Presisely, it is not totally atypical. People really don't flinch at that. This country is made up of many more people than just upper white middle class women that choose to give birth for the first time at 40.

I had PLEANTY of sex before I was 18. I just got extremly lucky that I did not fuck it all up and get myself knocked up, killed, or get an STD, as barely any of it was protected.

[Anonymous]

I think the OP is trying to turn the pregnancy story into a teachable moment - and it is a good idea. I had a conversation with my 17 yo, using this story as a springboard. The PP who suggests conversations from a young age is right - by the time they are 14, 15 it is too late, any conversation you initiate as a parent is viewed with suspicion then (guilty conscience? ). Or maybe my kids are atypical and most teenagers readily engage in conversations with their parents about sex, abstinence, birth control? maybe I did something wrong?

[Anonymous]

Personally I'd be encouraged to see discussions of any high profile pregnancy shifted to the health issue: unprotected sex in underage kids. It's the elephant in the room. It's shrouded by the hostile debates of life vs choice platforms. Whatever one's views on how/if sexual health issues are taught - not my point - the bottom line is about health and children. There are vague references to "STDs" but let's come out and say it: just because he's your boyfriend, doesn't mean you can't get HIV.

As Bristol's choice not to terminate is being lauded as a responsible thing to do after the fact of getting pregnant, there is also an opportunity help young women and unborn babies by promoting the need to get an HIV test after the fact.

This is not a partisan slam or a hidden pro-choice or pro-life comment. It's just frustrating to see a lack of leadership on all sides about this.

As you can imagine, I was not a fan of the Juno or Knocked-Up movies.

Sorry for bringing this kind of off-topic. It's just bugging me.

[Anonymous]

9:35, no I am not a Palin family insider so you're right, I don't know what "they" discussed. What I should have said more clearly is that I am disappointed that none or at least very few of the thousands of side-line commentators -- both those of the professional variety and people like us who just love to weigh in -- have even mentioned that perhaps two unwed 17 year olds who supposedly are considering the best interest of the child would have spoken out about considering adoption.

Nice that you think it only takes a staff of help -- a "brigade," I think you called it -- to raise a baby. I suppose an intact home that consists of two mature, committed adults, is inferior in your mind for this purpose.

[Anonymous]

This is more of a personal family issue which is why you're not going to read a lot of FACTS about it in the media (opinions - yes, speculations - yes, blogs - yes, but no facts or direct statements from the Palin family).

[Anonymous]

If Bristol is 5 months pregnant then she must be due around Inauguration Day. I hope Sarah is back in Alaska helping with the birth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If Bristol is 5 months pregnant then she must be due around Inauguration Day. I hope Sarah is back in Alaska helping with the birth.

You just put your finger on the proof that she's a good mother. She obviously chose to run just so her daughter would have access to the superior hospitals we have here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:9:35, no I am not a Palin family insider so you're right, I don't know what "they" discussed. What I should have said more clearly is that I am disappointed that none or at least very few of the thousands of side-line commentators -- both those of the professional variety and people like us who just love to weigh in -- have even mentioned that perhaps two unwed 17 year olds who supposedly are considering the best interest of the child would have spoken out about considering adoption.

Nice that you think it only takes a staff of help -- a "brigade," I think you called it -- to raise a baby. I suppose an intact home that consists of two mature, committed adults, is inferior in your mind for this purpose.

Do you work for MSNBC? Because you are a great spin doctor. What exactly is inferior in my mind and how did you make that leap?

I don't know about you, but having house staff 24x7 would make my job as a mom super easy. Maybe it's just me.