Anyone tried Dr. Becky?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree more with Bad Therapy and think Dr. Becky's style is too permissive. But to each their own.

Ewww. You actually read that crap?

NP. You sound super tolerant. No need to call ideas you don't agree with "crap," it makes you sound rather fragile.

OP, if Dr. Becky's advice doesn't work for you, keep looking. Gentle parenting is the current fad parenting style, but it doesn't work great for all families.

It’s crap because it’s political propaganda being pushed as parenting advice.

This. It’s not science it’s fear mongering right wing bullshit

i think you have the wrong wing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree more with Bad Therapy and think Dr. Becky's style is too permissive. But to each their own.

Ewww. You actually read that crap?

NP. You sound super tolerant. No need to call ideas you don't agree with "crap," it makes you sound rather fragile.

OP, if Dr. Becky's advice doesn't work for you, keep looking. Gentle parenting is the current fad parenting style, but it doesn't work great for all families.

It’s crap because it’s political propaganda being pushed as parenting advice.

This. It’s not science it’s fear mongering right wing bullshit

i think you have the wrong wing.

DP - yes, literally nothing that she says is even center right. The woman’s a liberal loon!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree more with Bad Therapy and think Dr. Becky's style is too permissive. But to each their own.

Ewww. You actually read that crap?

NP. You sound super tolerant. No need to call ideas you don't agree with "crap," it makes you sound rather fragile.

OP, if Dr. Becky's advice doesn't work for you, keep looking. Gentle parenting is the current fad parenting style, but it doesn't work great for all families.

It’s crap because it’s political propaganda being pushed as parenting advice.

This. It’s not science it’s fear mongering right wing bullshit

i think you have the wrong wing.

DP - yes, literally nothing that she says is even center right. The woman’s a liberal loon!

Look at the posts above. They aren’t taking about Dr Becky. Just a RW hack who pushes RW opinions as facts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have the youngest kids amongst my friend group so am not at the age where she’s as relevant but I will be steering farrr clear of anything she recommends because anecdotally my friends who watch her have the worst behaved kids, and it’s not even close. She seems to attract parents who have emotional issues themselves around discipline. I feel like she does less what’s best for the kid and more how to justify whatever parenting technique you want to do (which again, anecdotally, does not yield good kids).

I hope your friends and others are not as judgmental as you when your youngest gets older and act out. Judging how all kids act based on their parents shows that you are very naive, judgmental, and maybe not ready to be a parent (too late). My parents disciplined different than Dr Becky and my sibling has all sorts of issues...all from childhood.

You don't get to judge. Maybe you should tell your friends how you feel so they can get a better more understanding friend. Kids have ADHD, anxiety, all sorts of stuff. Kids act out for all types of reasons, not just due to how the parent disciplines their child.

DR Becky says different kids need different things. She also says if what she says doesn't work, get help elsewhere. Some of her stuff works for my kid, some doesn't. I like some of her phrasing and how she is non-judgmental for parents with kids who have trouble with things like transitions. But judging other parents is really awful (unless they are abusing the child like spanking them) as you have no idea what they have to deal with.

[Anonymous]

Trying to replace communities where people can raise kids to play and learn from each other and adults with parenting experts isn’t t going well is it?

I’m starting to think parenting advice is just a giant scam.

[Anonymous]

Meh. Once she partnered with Emily Oster I blocked her. She’s going for white liberal UMC

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have the youngest kids amongst my friend group so am not at the age where she’s as relevant but I will be steering farrr clear of anything she recommends because anecdotally my friends who watch her have the worst behaved kids, and it’s not even close. She seems to attract parents who have emotional issues themselves around discipline. I feel like she does less what’s best for the kid and more how to justify whatever parenting technique you want to do (which again, anecdotally, does not yield good kids).

I hope your friends and others are not as judgmental as you when your youngest gets older and act out. Judging how all kids act based on their parents shows that you are very naive, judgmental, and maybe not ready to be a parent (too late). My parents disciplined different than Dr Becky and my sibling has all sorts of issues...all from childhood.

You don't get to judge. Maybe you should tell your friends how you feel so they can get a better more understanding friend. Kids have ADHD, anxiety, all sorts of stuff. Kids act out for all types of reasons, not just due to how the parent disciplines their child.

DR Becky says different kids need different things. She also says if what she says doesn't work, get help elsewhere. Some of her stuff works for my kid, some doesn't. I like some of her phrasing and how she is non-judgmental for parents with kids who have trouble with things like transitions. But judging other parents is really awful (unless they are abusing the child like spanking them) as you have no idea what they have to deal with.

Sure you do. You can look at the results of people around you and figure out if you think what they're doing is working. People do that all the time. Yes, there might be one-offs, but if enough people try something and it's failing, you can draw a pretty firm inductive conclusion from that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have the youngest kids amongst my friend group so am not at the age where she’s as relevant but I will be steering farrr clear of anything she recommends because anecdotally my friends who watch her have the worst behaved kids, and it’s not even close. She seems to attract parents who have emotional issues themselves around discipline. I feel like she does less what’s best for the kid and more how to justify whatever parenting technique you want to do (which again, anecdotally, does not yield good kids).

Anecdotally, my friends who spanked their kids as toddlers have the best behaved kids. not even joking. the kids who grew up with "positive parenting" are the ones who are intolerable to have over because they have zero respect for adults and behave rudely.

Of course they are. They are terrified. Nothing like some violence to inspire good behavior. There is so much research about the damaging effects of spanking…

There are other consequences that are more effective and don’t damage relationships.

[Anonymous]

I found adhd dad more useful especially for boys with adhd

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree more with Bad Therapy and think Dr. Becky's style is too permissive. But to each their own.

Ewww. You actually read that crap?

NP. You sound super tolerant. No need to call ideas you don't agree with "crap," it makes you sound rather fragile.

OP, if Dr. Becky's advice doesn't work for you, keep looking. Gentle parenting is the current fad parenting style, but it doesn't work great for all families.

It’s crap because it’s political propaganda being pushed as parenting advice.

This. It’s not science it’s fear mongering right wing bullshit

i think you have the wrong wing.

DP - yes, literally nothing that she says is even center right. The woman’s a liberal loon!

What does she say that is political propaganda? I have listened to her a couple of times, but my kids are well behaved and nothing that she says apply to my family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Trying to replace communities where people can raise kids to play and learn from each other and adults with parenting experts isn’t t going well is it?

I’m starting to think parenting advice is just a giant scam.

I think this is spot on, as is a PP's point about people who have issues around the discipline they received as kids being attracted to Dr. Becky and the like. A friend who is the biggest Dr. Becky proponent 100% has issues around the relationship with her father and how harsh he was growing up.

I am definitely not pro-spanking, but I think the current positive parenting trend is a bunch of BS. Many people cannot implement it properly and it turns into permissive parenting. People are afraid to let their kids feel negative emotions, so they let them do whatever they want. I am shocked at how some people are letting their little kids behave in public. They are either complete wild animals or their noses are buried in screens. I am teaching my children to be respectful of those around them. When they don't act respectful, they should feel a little bad about how they acted because of how it negatively affects others. There's a difference between guilt and shame. Some guilt is a good thing because it upholds the social contract. Shame should be avoided. I think Dr. Becky actually teaches this, from what I have seen, but most parents don't seem to be able to differentiate. You can make a kid feel guilty and want to repair a situation without making them feel ashamed of themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Trying to replace communities where people can raise kids to play and learn from each other and adults with parenting experts isn’t t going well is it?

I’m starting to think parenting advice is just a giant scam.

I think this is spot on, as is a PP's point about people who have issues around the discipline they received as kids being attracted to Dr. Becky and the like. A friend who is the biggest Dr. Becky proponent 100% has issues around the relationship with her father and how harsh he was growing up.

I am definitely not pro-spanking, but I think the current positive parenting trend is a bunch of BS. Many people cannot implement it properly and it turns into permissive parenting. People are afraid to let their kids feel negative emotions, so they let them do whatever they want. I am shocked at how some people are letting their little kids behave in public. They are either complete wild animals or their noses are buried in screens. I am teaching my children to be respectful of those around them. When they don't act respectful, they should feel a little bad about how they acted because of how it negatively affects others. There's a difference between guilt and shame. Some guilt is a good thing because it upholds the social contract. Shame should be avoided. I think Dr. Becky actually teaches this, from what I have seen, but most parents don't seem to be able to differentiate. You can make a kid feel guilty and want to repair a situation without making them feel ashamed of themselves.

+1. Guilt is a natural reaction to doing something wrong. As long as this guilt is not misplaced (which can happen, the conscience isn't perfect and needs to be trained), it's not a bad thing. Then you have repentance for the wrong done, forgiveness from all involved, and relationships restored and hopefully the kid moves on, maybe even feels better afterwards because of the positive act of repenting. That's a great cycle, not a bad one.

[Anonymous]

I bought into Dr. Becky for years but ultimately What actually helped was ABA parent training. For my kid with behavioral issues, I think Dr. Becky was actually harmful because it was waaaaaaay too permissive.

As one example, I had really bought into the idea of bodily autonomy for children. But ABA teaches how to use “physical guidance”. My kid used to be completely out of control before and didn’t see me as an authority figure. That is changing now thanks to ABA.