How much to give silbing for wedding gift?

[Anonymous]

Sis, 15 years younger is getting married. No idea what an appropriate amount to give would be. Suggestions?

[Anonymous]

Depends on your financial situation and theirs as well as your culture/heritage.

We gave DH's brother a check for $200. The groom was 40, the bride was 27. Both had jobs and lived on their own. We have an income b/t $150-200K pretax. DH and the groom/brother are not close as the groom is DH's youngest sibling. We are midwest people, so we don't throw money around just to make a statement.

[Anonymous]

More if you're well off, less if you're not. I'd say $200 is a good number.... maybe more if a) they could really use it AND b) it's not a financial hardship for you. We'd probably go on the higher side for my youngest sibling because he'd appreciate it and we're much better off - maybe $400-$500, or gift of that equivalent.

[Anonymous]

Gave $5000 for my brother and SiL wedding gift. Culturally we would be expected to give gold. We opted cash instead.

[Anonymous]

$300 if you can afford it. $250/$200 is nice too, but don't do anything you can't afford.

Also, whatever you give just make sure you are at peace no matter how it is spent. My DH gave more to his bro since his bro has struggled financially before. They spent a large chunk of the money on 2 dogs (not rescue dogs) and then could not afford to care for the dogs long term and they didn't even work to find a loving home for the dogs. They still complain about how poor they are, but any money they get as a gift (for anniversary, Christmas) gets spent on frivolous things rather than making sure they can pay the rent. We stopped giving them money. We can't afford it and it just made them see us as an ATM. Instead for a birthday gift we may offer to pay for a repair or something if it is affordable.

[Anonymous]

It's not a financial hardship. I was thinking $500. We could afford more but more doesn't seem better to me.

[Anonymous]

I guess it depends on your social circle. In mine, childhood friends gave $500. We give $200 - $300 at every wedding we attend. If I had a sibling prob more around $1000. DH comes from central PA though and that group would be thrilled with $250.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess it depends on your social circle. In mine, childhood friends gave $500. We give $200 - $300 at every wedding we attend. If I had a sibling prob more around $1000. DH comes from central PA though and that group would be thrilled with $250.

When I got married, 5 sibs/spouses pitched in for a microwave (which we loved). So, not much gift-giving precedent to go on.

[Anonymous]

I think $500 is perfect for your circumstances, OP. We give $250 or so but have a lower HHI and our siblings have also given less.

[Anonymous]

My sister is 14 years younger than me. We gave her $1,000 when she got married. In retrospect that might have been too much, but I figured if you give friends $150 or so, why not significantly more for a sibling on a once-in-a-lifetime event? The fact that she was in her 20s and kinda broke was definitely a factor.

[Anonymous]

I chipped in $4K on her wedding expenses and then gave $500 in cash. Not that I was making a ton of money or anything, but it's family/

[Anonymous]

How much should we give to a more distant family member - my niece who is getting married for the second time in the fall? They are super nice, but we don't see them as much as we would like since they live in another part of the country.

Thanks

[Anonymous]

This seems nuts to me. I'm from St. Louis with the majority of my moms family living in a small country town about 80 miles away. I would never expect hundreds of dollars from any of them and we are very close. We all have the money, it's just not what's done. We give tangible gifts that will remind the person of us when they use them.