Friends party for 3rd birthday - open presents at party?
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Anonymous
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Planning a party for my kid's 3rd birthday. There will probably be around 7 kids, along with their parents and a few siblings. Very low-key party at home. Some families will bring gifts. At this young age, is it OK to just put the gifts on a table or something and open them after the party ends? Or do they need to be opened in front of the giver?
I think that my concern is that opening them as part of the party sort of makes gifts a big focus of the party, and I'd like to avoid that. Also, some families won't come with a gift, and I don't want them to feel bad. Also, the party is going to be pretty short, and I want to spend the time doing other things. What is the standard protocol here? Thanks for your thoughts! |
Anonymous
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I've been to about 40 birthday parties for 2, 3, and 4 year olds in the last two years. Only about 4 of them opened the gifts at the party.
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Anonymous
| I've been to parties with both. The kids like seeing the birthday kid open the presents, but it can also be overwhelming to the birthday kid. Depends on how many children you have there and how well you think your child can handle being in the gift spotlight. |
Anonymous
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This is an interesting issue and I'll be interested to see what people think. About a year ago, I attended my first children's birthday party since becoming a mom. I was really excited to pick out and wrap the gift for my friend's DD (she was turning 3). I was utterly disappointed when the party ended and the gifts remained unopened on the table. I called my sister and complained about how rude it was. My sister, who has a 6-yr-old, told me that this is standard practice for kids' parties (especially young kids), for a variety of reasons (e.g., the kids lack the attention span for the gift-opening; birthday child might display a rude response to a gift; other kids want to play with the gifts; etc. etc.). So, although I was very disappointed, as I had been looking forward to seeing the birthday girl open the gift we chose, I see why they did not open gifts at that party.
So, to answer your question, I think it's okay to not open gifts. However, I would make sure that you send thoughtful, unique thank-you notes to the gift-givers (i.e., something more than "thank you for the gift"). Good luck. |
Anonymous
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I also think this is an interesting question. Where I grew up, gifts were ALWAYS opened at the party. When I heard this was common practice here not to open the gift in front of the gift-giver, I was really surprised. But, I also see that it makes sense in a lot of ways. I will say that if I dont think they will open the gift in front of me, it has made me less likely to spend a lot of time picking out the perfect thing. I just buy something I think the kid will like and move on. I save the "thoughtful" gifts for kids who I know will open in front of me, like my nieces and nephews (as I am usually there after the party helping to clean up so I will be there to see them open gifts).
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Anonymous
| Don't open the gifts at the party!!! |
Anonymous
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pre-kids I thought I as in the 'gift opening' camp because I remember doing this at parties as a kid.
now with my own--we've never done it. It creates too much chaos, boxes are ripped open- parts go missing..kids get upset, etc. Grandparents always come early and we open theirs and aunt and uncle pre-party. all gifts from attendees we open after they depart. they are having so much fun running around with their friends they don't even notice. |
Anonymous
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not at this age. It will just end in numerous 3 yr old throwing tanrums because they want the gift.
Been to lots of parties for 3 yr old recently and none have open presents. |
Anonymous
as kids get older...I have a 6 year old too..there sometimes is a close friend that wants bday boy to open his gift. we have honored this and they will do it off to the side or at the tail end as everyone is departing. I think it is easier when they get older. With very small toddlers/preschoolers it's not as easy. |
Anonymous
ITA - if the gifts are opened at the party, no need for a thank you note. If the gifts are not opened at the party, a thoughtful note is really needed by the giver. |
Anonymous
| OP here. Thanks so much for all the replies! This is an "I love DCUM" moment. |
Anonymous
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absolutely not!!
i have never seen gifts opened at a party (except for my own in the 70's/80's)and having seen the responses my 3 year old had to some of her gifts when we opened them in private would have mortified me in public "mommy, we have this book and i don't like." "mommy, that's an ugly doll" "i didn't want a sweater" also, there is a huge range in what people give - one family gave a coloring book to her with a pack of crayons with a ribbon on it and another gave a gorgeously wrapped Puma outfit with a book, a pillow pet, and a pack of stickers.i would have hated for either family to feel uncomfortable about their gift. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
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Hi - We are having a party for our 3 year olds with mostly family but a few close friends. I think we will open gifts because I want the kids to say thank you and they have fun doing it. I don't think people will feel bad about our kids reactions to the gifts...and it gives us a chance to say thnank you in person as well.
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Anonymous
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At all the birthday parties we've been to so far (2 and 3 year olds), no kid has ever opened presents during the party.
Honestly, I think it's a lot to expect a bunch of 3 year olds to sit around and watch someone else open gifts! I'd say no opening gifts at the party. |