no fetal pole, post-ivf u/s 6 wks 2 days

[Anonymous]

Yes, I would certainly consider donor eggs. My husband is quite dubious about it, though. I don't think I'll be able to get him on board without trying regular IVF again.

But as for regular IVF, the clock is definitely ticking, as the 03/03/2011 21:45 poster pointed out. At age 42, I do not have much time left, if there is any meaningful time remaining even now. That makes this situation so much more dreadful. An IVF cycle takes 2 months even under the best of circumstances. How long will I have to wait to try again if this pregnancy fails, as appears likely? I have had a miscarriage before (back when I was 38, before seeking fertility treatments), and I wound up having to get a D/C because a whole trimester elapsed, with fetal demise occurring at about 5 and 1/2 weeks, and the miscarriage had still not occurred. It sounds like there are a lot of different policies at fertility clinics, but many require a couple of intervening cycles after a D/C before permitting someone to attempt IVF again. At that rate, I'll be approaching 43 and my chances will be even worse than they are now.

As bad as the failed IVF the first time around was, I must say that it is so much preferable to a failed pregnancy. At least one gets closure more quickly!

Anyway, here's to hoping for some miracles!

[Anonymous]

I have a similar story from last year, although I was younger so the time pressure was not there (although I did feel pressured because I knew I'd be relocating for my job and didn't want to transfer clinics).

I got a BFP on my first IVF attempt at Shady Grove (Dr. Osborn) and at the first U/S baby had delayed growth and no heartbeat visible. A week later the heartbeat was there, but slow, and a week or two after that, no heartbeat. I opted for a D&C to get it over with and move on and then used acupuncture to help get my HSG levels back down to zero.

The D&C was in September 2008 and I was able to do a FET cycle in November 2008, getting a BFP in December 2008. Baby born August 2009 is now a wonderful 18 month old, and we're starting IVF all over for #2 because we don't have an embryoes left. But now I've got low ovarian reserve in addition to the MF issues that we always ahd, so we'll see.

I didn't mean to make that all about me. Keeping my fingers crossed for a miracle, and best of luck to you with this process.

[Anonymous]

OP - just wanted to wish you best of luck and happy thoughts for your appointment tomorrow. I know all too well how difficult and stressful this is. I have to go back again on Wednesday after seeing the heartbeat on thursday. Im still praying for a miracle. Let us know how it goes tomorrow.

[Anonymous]

Thanks so much for the kind wishes - so sweet of you to remember. Unfortunately, no miracle was forthcoming for me. The repeat u/s showed no further embryonic growth beyond 5 and 1/2 weeks and no heartbeat. So this pregnancy is a definite loss. Looks like a D&C for me sometime this week.

Best of luck, PP, with your ultrasound tomorrow. The chances are never all that good for oldsters, but I have to believe that seeing a heartbeat must be a good thing. Please keep us posted. I'll be thinking of you and hoping for the best.

[Anonymous]

PP here - Unfortunately, the heartbeat stopped. Our little miracle isnt going to happen this time. Im so sad and trying to decide if it is better to let this happen naturally or to have a D&C. We are going to speak with Dr. MOttla on friday and find out which is best to get us to start our next cycle the soonest. Im not getting any younger!
thanks for all of the kind words.

[Anonymous]

PP, I'm so sorry to hear your news. I know it is extremely upsetting, even though you were trying your best not to be too hopeful. I tried to maintain the statistically-appropriate level of skepticism about my own chances, too, but it is very hard not to get excited after that positive pregnancy test. Yesterday was a very bad day for me.

Having read that among women ages 41-42 miscarriage rates are around 45%, I was hoping that with bad news for me yesterday that your outcome would be among the better half. Sadly, that was not to be.

I'm wishing you the best of luck as you move forward. I'm struggling with the decision about donor eggs now. My husband is pretty reluctant to go down that road, but with IVF success rates of 12%-15% at my age, I'm just wondering whether there's any point in trying again with my own eggs. We've had good #s retrieved both this time and last (14 and 19 respectively), but apparently they're mostly defective. Few have made it to day 5, and there have been none morphologically suitable for freezing. We transferred 3 each time-- 3 "beautiful" grade 1 AAs last time--with no success.

PP, considering our similar situations, I'd love to know how things go as you proceed, if you'd like to stay in further touch.

[Anonymous]

I'm 43 and after three years of undergoing IUIs, and three failed IVF (one with an empty sac/no heartbeat M/C), we went to CCRM and did a 4th IVF. We had a better response on embryos, but when they did the genetic testing---all of the embryos were chromosomally defective. That was devastating news, but it was better for me to know before enduring another hopeless 2WW and possible early miscarriage situation again. I think if you are over 40 and doing IVF, adding the genetic testing is definitely worth it.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the advice re: genetic testing. I'm sure that you're right.

When they do the d&c, they'll let me know what they find as to the possible genetic cause of this m/c. But at my age, I'm pretty sure it's nothing more or less than the usual age-related aneuploid eggs problem.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry OP and PP. Best of luck to you both in the future.

[Anonymous]

OP - wow - you really had great follicle production. I only had 6 and 8 for the second round.

I would love to stay in touch and follow how our stories unfold. I was trying not to feel sorry for myself today and Im making some progress feeling better. Waiting to find out if this happens naturally or d and c. My doctor wants to schedule one if nothing happens before friday. I just want to do whatever will allow us to start another cycle the soonest - IM NOT GETTING ANY YOUNGER! Still contemplating the idea of donor egg. My DH is all for it if it would save us having this heartache again. I think I am willing to try one more cycle with my own eggs but really dont think I could handle another scenario like we have both had over the past 3 weeks.

should I send you my email address?

[Anonymous]

Email exchange would be great! My address was on the first post. It would be great to stay in touch.

Yes, in the same boat as you - probably going for regular IVF one more time, and looking to make it happen just as soon as possible. I'm going in for D&C tomorrow afternoon. I figure that is the quickest way to bring the hCG levels back down. And, besides, I can't handle the stress of wondering when the m/c will happen on its own, which could be weeks away. (And, with my luck, when I'm at work!) This is not the first time I've had a missed miscarriage - there was another back before seeking fertility treatments, and I went many weeks (almost through the first trimester) before getting the D&C, even though fetal demise happened right around the same time (at 5 and 1/2 weeks, according to measurements).

[Anonymous]

To all you wonderful ladies who are forty and fabulous, keep your head up and stay encouraged. I found out today that my 6w2d u/s only showed a g.s. My doctor said he is "Cautiously optimistic" which doesn't make for a comfortable time. But I do encourage you to stay positive because no matter the result, that will get you through alot of things. As much as I dislike this topic, I'm glad to know that I'm not alone. If I can help any of you in any way, please do not hesitate to reach out. I think a great support group would be an amazing idea - please feel free to email me at [e-mail]. Stay strong ladies.

[Anonymous]

Hi, OP here, thanks for your supportive message, 11:58 poster. Can't say as I'm feeling all that fabulous at the moment, considering what happened last week. But, you're right: there's no substitute for a positive outlook.

I know just how difficult the wait you're going through is, though my RE never gave me reason to think he was cautiously optimistic about my chances after that first u/s. Your RE must have seen something more encouraging - perhaps a gs measuring at the correct size?

I am wishing you all the best over the coming week. Sounds like you already have the right attitude - hope you can keep it going through what is considerably worse than the typical 2ww. Please keep us posted. I hope you'll give this 40+, first u/s discussion thread at least one success story.

[Anonymous]

OP, I am just curious to know if your levels were doubling? I am going through the same thing and the only thing is keeping me slightly positive is that my levels are doubling, but I read that this doesn't mean I won't miscarry. Thannks.

[Anonymous]

Just wanted to mention that this is an old thread from over a year ago. I hope everyone has been blessed with good luck in that time. As tor me...no (as of yet.) But still hopeful for a baby (bio or adopt.)