Do you think the nicest people are usually more attractive?

[Anonymous]

Often people seem more attractive when you get to know them and know how nice/kind they are.

[Anonymous]

I agree with you OP. Some people treat ugliness like a bad smell and then that person experiences more trauma. The default for pretty people is to smile at them and ugly people to frown at them. It takes a long time for people to change their behavior towards you because of your personality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve met many men who were extremely nice, but,

- that part of their personality was a major turn-off.

+1000

Nice guys are so cringy.

[Anonymous]

I'd be kind too if I never went through tough times created by people around me. This would have never happened if I had had money.
If my dad had been rich, he could have got the prettiest girl in town and I would most likely look quite good.
I believe money, prettiness, and kindness go together more often than not. There's no reason to be bitter if you have money, are pretty and have easy life.

[Anonymous]

I think sometimes the most attractive girls can be bullied because others are jealous. They might not always be treated well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I’m really ugly but super kind, funny and helpful. Nobody notices.

🤮

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd be kind too if I never went through tough times created by people around me. This would have never happened if I had had money.
If my dad had been rich, he could have got the prettiest girl in town and I would most likely look quite good.
I believe money, prettiness, and kindness go together more often than not. There's no reason to be bitter if you have money, are pretty and have easy life.

You really like to generalize. Do you not have many life experiences?

[Anonymous]

No. Most the mean people I recall from middle and high school were also pretty.

My son is very attractive, but has mental health issue that make him act crazy. No one is complimenting his niceness.

And one of my best friends is ugly, but so kind and truly the best person I know.

[Anonymous]

The nicest people are going to be those that have a central peace and congruity about who they are and how they feel about themselves. Sometimes that goes with physical beauty, and sometimes that does not.

There are a lot of physically beautiful people who are chasing one dragon or another, whether out of some internal hollowness, trauma, or what have you. There are ugly people who are straight and comfortable with themselves as they are. And the reverse for these, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The mean girl is also usually not the prettiest.

+1

The mean girl usually believes they are the prettiest. The tend to harvest "cheerleaders" to keep around them during life, so they tend to think that they are prettier, smarter, etc. than they are. In other words, delusional. They tend to target nicer, more pleasant people (who have seen more adversity in their life). The "cheerleaders" tend to not be as loyal as the mean girl thinks

True.

[Anonymous]

Plenty of unattractive people are very nice, and I've noticed a lot of very attractive people are nice too. But there is this type of grown up mean girl has a lot of attractive friends, and people listen to/follow her for whatever reason. Maybe these are the girls who were the oldest in the class growing up and that helped them develop a confidence and bossiness that shapes how they approach social situations. I remember being mystified by the unattractive but popular/powerful girls growing up, and was surprised to see that they're still around in adulthood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The mean girl is also usually not the prettiest.

+1

The mean girl usually believes they are the prettiest. The tend to harvest "cheerleaders" to keep around them during life, so they tend to think that they are prettier, smarter, etc. than they are. In other words, delusional. They tend to target nicer, more pleasant people (who have seen more adversity in their life). The "cheerleaders" tend to not be as loyal as the mean girl thinks

Agree with this, though IME the meanest women are the ones who are slightly above average looking but have a LOT of resources (or channel a lot of resources) towards looking as good as possible. I think one reason they are so mean is because they work so hard to be better than other women and it gives them the feeling that they are more deserving of... whatever. Attention, friendship, certain men.

The meanest woman I ever met was cute but not beautiful. She had doting parents, money, and in her early 30s managed to lose about 20 lbs and was "hot" for the first time in her life. She was vicious. She targeted women she perceived as having things she felt she deserved more -- women with good boyfriends when she was single, women who were well-liked by mutual friends or coworkers. She collected a group of hangers-on who were universally heavier and homelier than she was (and also, interestingly, much younger). From the outside, it just looked like she was living out some teenage fantasy of being the queen bee. But she wasn't ugly or beautiful. I think she was essential average but worked very hard to convince people otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Plenty of unattractive people are very nice, and I've noticed a lot of very attractive people are nice too. But there is this type of grown up mean girl has a lot of attractive friends, and people listen to/follow her for whatever reason. Maybe these are the girls who were the oldest in the class growing up and that helped them develop a confidence and bossiness that shapes how they approach social situations. I remember being mystified by the unattractive but popular/powerful girls growing up, and was surprised to see that they're still around in adulthood.

I see two of these women around our area. Both are tall, not thin, wealthy brunettes. They are not pretty but not ugly either. Both are surrounded by prettier women who seem to follow them around. Funny.

[Anonymous]

I'm the homely sibling and learned from an early age that I had to be extra-nice to be noticed or included by others because people didn't respond to my looks the way they did my sibling (who was attractive and mean as a snake).

I notice among my daughter's classmates and friends that there are some very pretty girls who are quite nice. I think it's because of the way people respond to their looks. They almost have a guileless kindness to them because they can't imagine a world where people would not treat them well. My DD is elementary school aged, so I've been curious if the nice pretty girls will stay that way or realize they power they hold and use it in different ways. I think of it as similar to the kind of rich people who are blindly generous- it doesn't hurt them to give so it's easy for them to do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve met many men who were extremely nice, but,

- that part of their personality was a major turn-off.

+1000

Nice guys are so cringy.

This reveals so much about you.