I don’t know why I’m so irrationally hurt by this!

[Anonymous]

I think it can be awkward to be friends with someone and then not at all, as in not even a birthday wish every few years, never a comment. I have unfriended for that reason because it made me a little sad. It's a lot easier with acquaintance/more casual people.

[Anonymous]

I agree that it's irrational. But I have felt the same way. Old friends, I realize I was unfriended but the rest of the old group is still friends. Could be an accident. Could be annoyed because it post kid pics / travel pics or whatever they personally don't care to see. Could be they just don't want to keep people they haven't seen in 30 years and somehow I didn't make the cut. No idea, and yeah, it feels a little sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Nothing political or controversial ever, and I only occasionally post, maybe once a quarter I’ll post a few pics of what we’ve been up to and they are always well received.

Maybe stuff is going on with her DD and it became painful or upsetting for her to see posts from you about your same-age DD. I don't do Facebook but I have learned as a parent that sometimes it's the friendships with the people whose kids are most like yours, and closest in age, that are harder, because it's too easy to compare or for people to feel competitive. I have a mom friend I met when our kids were babies who I keep a bit at arms length because I see how often our conversations fall into natural comparison between our kids who are almost the exact same age, and I don't think it's healthy, even though I like her a lot.

NP, I have also done this. I'm happy for them that things are good, but I've also found that I'm happier not knowing all the details all the time.

[Anonymous]

I got rid of everyone who posted a lot for a while and then finally I just stopped looking altogether. So my follow list is not curated at all and has no correlation to whom I value.

[Anonymous]

Any chance you were unfriended in error? That was the first thing that came to mind. Send a friend request, and if it gets declined you will have your answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been FB friends with someone I went to a private K-8 with since literally the beginning of FB itself. We are in our 40s. We hadn’t kept up IRL but we both had daughters around the same time, a little later than average, and they both ended up being only children, so we sort of bonded over that on FB. We have a ton of mutual friends who also went to the K-8, everyone is spread out across the country. Today I was fooling around on FB when I thought about her and how she hasn’t posted lately. You guessed it, she unfriended me. The funny thing is, we still have all the same mutual friends! She didn’t unfriend anyone else from our school. I can’t think of anything I would have done to offend her, our interactions were always benign. Her profile is public so I can see what she’s up to, her DD is adorable as ever, everything else seems the same.

Why in the world would she have unfriended just me? I almost want to ask but that’s weird. “Hey, I know we are essentially strangers who knew each other 30+ years ago and haven’t seen each other in person since then, but why did you unfriend me?” So, if you’ve unfriended in this way, why?

I get this. I have a childhood friend/frenemy who BLOCKED me on Facebook. It really threw me for a loop. I have no idea why. I admit I did post a few political things in 2016, but pretty mild stuff. And she didn't block me then. After the election I decided no political stuff at all and kept it to family pics and the like. I thought she quit Facebook in like 2020-2021 because I never saw her post anymore. I figured out she blocked me when her ex-husband died and my best friend mentioned her post.

I was pretty upset for an evening. We weren't necessarily close, but we grew up four houses apart from each other from before kindergarten until HS graduation. We were in the same school, Girl Scout troop, carpooled, and have a wide circle of the same friends. We were part of the same clique in middle school. O got over it, but there was something about the "you're dead to me" block that really stung.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you’re not in touch at all, she may have decided to prune her friend list to people she’s actually still in contact with. You don’t know what her relationships are with your other friends.

This,
I like to spend quick cursory on FB, got rid of over posters, repetitive content - otherwise time suck.

[Anonymous]

I block any and all tRumpers. All but one are from high school. ADIOS!

[Anonymous]

Do you realize the whole friends thing on FB is fake? If you were actual friends you’d be seeing each other and getting together IRL!

[Anonymous]

It could be anything op. Something you posted that struck a nerve, or you post too much, or too little according to her. It’s not really a reflection on you as a person but on your Facebook persona.

[Anonymous]

Most likely causes of unfriending are because they are annoyed by:
1) Political posts
2) Bragging about your kids or life too much

or 3) it was a complete accident

[Anonymous]

Sometimes I prune my friends list, because I feel weird about having someone have this window into my life when I haven't seen them for 30 years and we aren't actually friends. It's not personal, it's just we aren't friends.

[Anonymous]

I let my preschooler play some game on my phone once and 5 minutes later she had unfriended people from Facebook and friended some stranger and messaged him several times. She couldn’t read or write and had no idea what she was doing, just messing around and touching the screen over and over.

[Anonymous]

You are in excellent company OP.

I also feel this way when I discover that someone un friended me. 🙁
I take everything personally.

What hurts me the most is when people I grew up with & went to Elementary -> High School delete me as their friend.

I wouldn’t ask them the reason OP as there is likely a gamut of them.

I just let it go + move on w/my life.

It sucks but what can you do?