Found out DD13’s good friend’s father is on the sex offender registey

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone who grew up in a more unstable home, I really appreciated being able to go to friends’ houses, stay there for dinner, and have some semblance of what it’s like to have a normal childhood.

I appreciate you sharing this. Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would continue to be a safe space for the friend and keep your home open to her, absolutely. But obviously never ever over there.

I was hoping this would be the consensus, because this is how I feel! She is so sweet and a good friend to DD and I don’t want to punish her for her father’s actions! Thanks for your kind reply.

SO that's what you do. Remember people can change. If your are at all religious I imagine your religion tells you to forgive. My immediate neighbor is on a registry and actually served time (computer porn). I love his wife. He's been nothing but great and kind to my family. I have forgiven. Can you?

Uh serving time for computer porn? That sounds like child porn. Ewwww. Hell no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As someone who grew up in a more unstable home, I really appreciated being able to go to friends’ houses, stay there for dinner, and have some semblance of what it’s like to have a normal childhood.

Same. I realized what was normal/healthy vs my home environment. My best friend in the world (30 years) helped me figure that out.

[Anonymous]

The registry is mostly garbage.

They should be totally revamped or ditched.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every time that you meet a man, do you search the sex registry?

That's your response? OP is protecting her child. It's his own fault and behavior that he's on the registry. The registry is there for a reason and this is it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The registry is mostly garbage.

They should be totally revamped or ditched.

There's a lot of garbage making the registry. Sex offenders are totally garbage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would continue to be a safe space for the friend and keep your home open to her, absolutely. But obviously never ever over there.

I was hoping this would be the consensus, because this is how I feel! She is so sweet and a good friend to DD and I don’t want to punish her for her father’s actions! Thanks for your kind reply.

SO that's what you do. Remember people can change. If your are at all religious I imagine your religion tells you to forgive. My immediate neighbor is on a registry and actually served time (computer porn). I love his wife. He's been nothing but great and kind to my family. I have forgiven. Can you?

Uh serving time for computer porn? That sounds like child porn. Ewwww. Hell no.

This. Adult porn is not illegal. Child porn has many victims. The PP has forgiven? Was she a victim? Only the victims can forgive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would continue to be a safe space for the friend and keep your home open to her, absolutely. But obviously never ever over there.

I was hoping this would be the consensus, because this is how I feel! She is so sweet and a good friend to DD and I don’t want to punish her for her father’s actions! Thanks for your kind reply.

SO that's what you do. Remember people can change. If your are at all religious I imagine your religion tells you to forgive. My immediate neighbor is on a registry and actually served time (computer porn). I love his wife. He's been nothing but great and kind to my family. I have forgiven. Can you?

You have forgiven? What did he do to you? Wasn't kind to the kids in the videos was he?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That must be horrible. I assume you haven’t told DD yet? Let DD’s friend come over to your house, but always supervise pickup and drop off (for example, if you’re at work, don’t let the friend’s father drop the friend off to an empty-except-DD house).

I feel bad for DD’s friend. She probably doesn’t know.

I truly don’t get the impression the girl knows. I have no plans of telling DD. She’s never even spoken to the father. I’ve only met him briefly, and then spoke to him via the phone when they were younger and needed coordinating.

You’ve only met him briefly and spoken to coordinate meetups, but you’ve also had detailed conversations about your career? I really hope someone wouldn’t make up a story like this, but this sounds fake.

[Anonymous]

Why would you punish the child for her father's transgressions? There is a reason he hasn't invited your daughter over and that is because he is not allowed to. He is doing the right thing in that regard. Of course your daughter should still be friends with the child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would continue to be a safe space for the friend and keep your home open to her, absolutely. But obviously never ever over there.

I was hoping this would be the consensus, because this is how I feel! She is so sweet and a good friend to DD and I don’t want to punish her for her father’s actions! Thanks for your kind reply.

SO that's what you do. Remember people can change. If your are at all religious I imagine your religion tells you to forgive. My immediate neighbor is on a registry and actually served time (computer porn). I love his wife. He's been nothing but great and kind to my family. I have forgiven. Can you?

I don’t know what religion you speak of, but you may want to look into what forgiveness means. My religion tells me that I should hold on to hatred for someone who has wronged me or feel tgat they are indebted to me. To me, that is forgiveness. I don’t see how forgiveness has anything to do with your neighbor, wife, and “computer porn”.

[Anonymous]

i should NOT hold on to hatred….

[Anonymous]

Tough situation, but I second the contribution that all sorts of non-abusive, non-sexual things can get people onto the sex offender registry, like getting caught peeing in a public place. (Good manners, no, but if you did it when you were 21 and you're still getting punished, that's a lot.) Take care of yourself and your daughter and that's all you need to do.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't allow my child alone with him or their house but the kids can still be friends and be at your house.

[Anonymous]

I don't know why you would stop having the friend over at your house. The friend is not the offender. There will be many times in her life that people reject her because of what her father did. You don't have to add one more.