What do you most enjoy talking about when you are socializing?

[Anonymous]

I feel like I'm not a great conversationalist and I'd like to be better. I think I do a pretty good job of asking questions and listening and not just talking myself, but I often feel like I am just not asking the right questions or bringing up the right topics. I'm trying to get a sense for what sorts of things do people really *enjoy* talking about?

For me the stuff I most enjoy talking about are movies, music, art (museums generally or specific shows or artists), certain sports, pretty much any hobby (even if not one I do), and travel. Some people love talking about this stuff but some people seem disinterested. I'm trying to get a sense for other things people really like to be asked about or that will make them enthusiastic to talk.

What topics bring you out of your shell and bring you joy to discuss with someone you might not know that well?

[Anonymous]

You have to feel your way through. Catch a hint of a topic from the other side and probe in that direction, pivot if it’s a dead end. There is no one topic that works all the time for everyone.

[Anonymous]

I prefer to talk to people about the stuff we have in common. So honestly talking about kids with parents that have same age kids (or if we know each other thru kids), work with colleagues or ppl in the industry, neighborhood/local stuff with neighbors. I honestly find talking about travel, TV shows, and most of the topics you list to be boring and require a high level of effort / fake engagement. I know this makes me sound very boring.

I enjoy talking about politics, history, etc. on a deeper level with close friends.

[Anonymous]

it depends on the person, the circumstance, etc. One day I'm in the mood to talk about the day my mother died, and one day I'm not. I wanted to talk about Swan Lake, but not with someone who doesn't appreciate ballet. I like psychoanalyzing people and things, but not with someone simple (or drunk).

[Anonymous]

Ancient Rome

[Anonymous]

Completely depends on who I’m talking to

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ancient Rome

I'm more Byzantine Empire

[Anonymous]

OP here, yes I get it depends on the person and context. But surely most people have subjects that just make them more excited to talk about than others. What is a subject that if it came up at a cocktail party or around the Thanksgiving table, you would be excited to participate, regardless of your relationship to the others in the conversation? I am just curious if I can learn something from the responses or maybe broaden my horizons a bit.

[Anonymous]

I like talking about kids/parenting, books/movies/tv/poetry/podcasts/etc (although it’s hard if the other person and I don’t have overlapping taste), travel, hobbies (my own and other people’s), history/culture (as long as everyone is respectful), and trivia. Many many people want to talk about sports and work and while I try I rarely feel like I have anything constructive to add to those conversations. Politics is also a perennial favourite that I dislike unless the other person is a libritarian (I’m not but for some reason every single one I’ve met excels at dispassionate debate and I don’t find their core philosophy repulsive so we can have good conversations; with other people they and I often bring too many emotions to the discussion and it’s too easy for it to turn into a fight).