Skip baby shower?

[Anonymous]

We don't have a lot of friends and all of our family lives states away. One Friend wants to throw a shower for us but we would invite one other person and then just us. Seems so silly. And I know we are lucky to have the small circle we do and I'm just throwing a pity party for myself. It's hard when I see others with multiple showers and such a big community. I thought about just taking the two friends to dinner and calling it a day. But. What did y'all do , those of you without big networks

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry, that’s a bummer. Are you really sure there aren’t more people you would want to invite (Co-workers? Neighbors?) or that people wouldn’t be willing to travel? I think you’d be surprised at how many people want to celebrate a new baby, and many people may send gifts even if they can’t attend a shower. That said, I think there can be something really nice about a small shower. Baby showers with tons of people who don’t know each other can be awkward, and it’s hard to get excited about unwrapping a diaper genie or nipple pads. Going out to dinner with two friends who care about you might be a wonderful evening.

[Anonymous]

We didn’t have one.

[Anonymous]

I am currrently pregnant and will likely not have one because my husband and I also live far away from friends and family. I feel totally fine about it. No big deal. We will take a baby moon and also just buy the things we need for the baby. Having a baby shower doesn’t need to be a litmus test for how many people you have in your life and how loved you are. A lot of people also really act out at these events and they can be more complicated than they first appear both emotionally and otherwise.

[Anonymous]

We ended up not having one. Nobody local to us offered to host what would have been a tiny (5? guests) gathering. I considered just inviting those few girls over for a brunch, but it didn’t come together since DH and I were in the process of moving late second/third trimester. My closest friends and family are also spread out such that doing something in my home state was also not a great solution.
The fact that nobody was willing to help host something low key (after I flew cross-country and spent thousands on their bachelorettes and weddings…) stung a little, but I can also see it was nice not to have to worry about a shower. I was able to get exactly what I wanted, and those I care about most came to visit after the baby was born.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We ended up not having one. Nobody local to us offered to host what would have been a tiny (5? guests) gathering. I considered just inviting those few girls over for a brunch, but it didn’t come together since DH and I were in the process of moving late second/third trimester. My closest friends and family are also spread out such that doing something in my home state was also not a great solution.
The fact that nobody was willing to help host something low key (after I flew cross-country and spent thousands on their bachelorettes and weddings…) stung a little, but I can also see it was nice not to have to worry about a shower. I was able to get exactly what I wanted, and those I care about most came to visit after the baby was born.

Edited to add that we also elected to take a baby moon once it was clear the shower wouldn’t come together. That placated me.

[Anonymous]

Could you do a pregnancy announcement with a link to a registry so people can send things if they wish, then just a nice brunch with your local friends?

I live 1000 miles from any family and have a few friends here, but I met them in my 30s. I would skip the pity party too.