Admission etiquette?

[Anonymous]

Forgive me for this pretty basic question, but this is my first experience with admissions (daughter will be in preschool) and I'm trying to understand the etiquette surrounding it. The school we're waiting to hear from said that they planned to make offers the last week of March, that families would have a week to decide, and that when that week was up, they would begin to move down the waitlist. Admissions officer said sometimes the whole process can take up to a month to sort out, so it would be possible for us to hear absolutely nothing until close to the end of April. They said that if the end of April comes, then we probably didn't get in, but we can feel free to call at that point to verify.

Is it reasonable to call before then, and try to get a sense of where daughter is on the wait list? Admittedly, I don't really have a practical reason for doing this, I just can't imagine being in limbo for the next month. It seems like by next week they should at least be able to say something like, "You're number 7 and your chances are good" or "You're number 42 so you it's not looking likely."

[Anonymous]

Waitlists aren’t that straight forward. They want to balance the class out between boys and girls, plus younger and older by birthday. Siblings get preference. If they told you to wait (it’s not even April yet) then that’s what you do. Remember that they also don’t want to admit high needs parents so don’t be a PITA.

[Anonymous]

What the above person said. If all the boys or all the olders or all the youngers say yes, then I'm on the hunt through the waitlist for the opposite. If there aren't many in the middle kids who said yes, then I'll be looking down the waitlist for those kids. I try to balance the classroom by sex and age and also balance diversity because we have children at our school for 3 years.

It's so hard to not be able to tell parents exactly where they are, but that's the truth, we aren't trying to be cagey. And when I make an offer, I do need to give parents a few days to make the decision as I know they've applied to other programs. So it can take a while, depending on how many accept the space.

[Anonymous]

Sorry hit return too fast.

That all being said, if you have an offer but would prefer a different school, you are welcome to contact them and tell them that, and see if they have anything they can share. Sometimes I can, sometimes I can't, but honestly, knowing a parent will say yes from the waitlist means a LOT because at the end of the day, I really want the classrooms all full.

[Anonymous]

Get a nanny. Any place that is that arrogant to put parents in limbo like that isn't worth it. Imagine the "preference" or attention they give when there is a problem or kids have a conflict. Biggest donors = more attention. Clearly you'd be at the bottom of that pile too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get a nanny. Any place that is that arrogant to put parents in limbo like that isn't worth it. Imagine the "preference" or attention they give when there is a problem or kids have a conflict. Biggest donors = more attention. Clearly you'd be at the bottom of that pile too.

Were you born in the 50s? Most preschools are private and tend not to request sizable donations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get a nanny. Any place that is that arrogant to put parents in limbo like that isn't worth it. Imagine the "preference" or attention they give when there is a problem or kids have a conflict. Biggest donors = more attention. Clearly you'd be at the bottom of that pile too.

Eh, I’m on a waitlist for public preschool and it’s worse.