Hosting a non-binary child. Other than pronouns anything I should be sensitive to?
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Anonymous
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Hi,
My first grader has hit it off with a child who uses they / them pronouns. The kiddos will have a play date soon. I assume there’s nothing I need to think about other than using the correct pronouns but thought I’d check in case there’s anything I (mom) might be completely oblivious to. Thanks! (Ps - obviously I’ll check in on stuff like food allergies!) |
Anonymous
| You’re so sweet to think of us. I am the mother of a non-binary child, and the only thing I would say is that if you ever have to go anywhere, make sure you understand which bathroom they prefer to use. |
Anonymous
| If you say things like "hey guys", I'd avoid that. Other than that, I can't really think of anything I do differently. It made me pretty conscious of how I often I use pronouns when that person is around, and it isn't often. |
Anonymous
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You are a good human OP.
This is a wonderful post. I agree with PP just skip the "hey guys" if you even use that. |
Anonymous
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Mercifully when the child is with you, there's very little need to use pronouns.
Also, although it's not so popular in the DMV, y'all is a very useful alternative to "you guys". |
Anonymous
| Op here. Thanks for the advice. I actually think for the first get together the kids and moms will be meeting up at a playground. My daughter has been having a very tough time (I found out today she was recently pushed down and her shoe came off and she had to get it out of the trash can) and this child makes her laugh and be happy and silly so I’m excited. To the person who made a comment about how to act if they have male parts or female parts, I neither know nor care what body parts this child has. It’s not like the kids need particular genitalia to play tag or go on the monkey bars. |
Anonymous
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What is wrong with “hey guys”?
I use this with everyone, male and female, regardless of whether any actual “guys” are present. I’m from the Midwest though. |
Anonymous
| Goodness, the people who get the most upset about pronouns are the ones who don't even understand basic grammar. |
Anonymous
Same here. This is one thing I’d thought would be fine! It’s gender neutral in my 50 yrs of life experience. |
Anonymous
+1 “Hey guys” needs to be normalized again. I never mean just “males” when I say it. |
Anonymous
Isn't that basically a NY/NJ thing that spread throughout the country? I could be mistaken about it's origin. I think we should normalize "hey gals" or "hey girls" as a gender neutral greeting to a mixed sex group personally. |
Anonymous
“Hey guys” is not a gendered statement. I use that with mom friends and dads and everything all the time. |
Anonymous
| Run away |
Anonymous
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Kudos to you for being such a kind and considerate parent, ally, and community member. I wish more parents were as inclusive and considerate as you seem to be in thinking about making this child feel comfortable.
Your child and their new friend are lucky to have you. |