Hosting a sleepover

[Anonymous]

My 7 year old daughter will have her friend over for a sleepover this weekend. Since I did not grow up on this country, I am not sure what to arrange for them during a sleepover, since I don't ever recall going for a sleepover in my country.

What do you do? I was going to order pizza and have them watch a movie that night, have little sleeping matresses for the girls on the floor in my daughter's room, read a good night story to them by 8:30 pm, and make crepes for them in the morning and bake. Is that too involved? Are they supposed to stay up that night as long as they want and read stories and eat popcorn and stuff like that? I have NO CLUE as you can tell!

Thank you for your advice there!

Clueless Mom!!

[Anonymous]

You are not clueless! That's perfect! They may be excited and want to stay up a little later, which is to be expected. I bet it will be wonderful!

[Anonymous]

Sounds perfect. You may want to let them stay up just a tiny bit later if they seem like they want to, but at that age I bet they will be tuckered out and ready for bed.

Your ideas sound perfect, and I'm sure will make your guest feel welcome- a bedtime story would help me sleep a little better at a new house!

I always let the girls know they can wake me up for any reason, and frequently they do, but that might be good to make sure of.

[Anonymous]

Perfect -- this is just how we started with sleepovers for my 10-year-old DD. My only suggestion is that you might ask your daughter if she'd like you to read them a story or maybe play a board or card game with them. (She might feel like playing a game is a more "grown-up" thing to do with her guest.) Then, I'd let them read and talk in bed for 30 minutes or so until 9 p.m. Also, I'd leave a night light for your guest in the bathroom and maybe one in the bedroom too if she's used to that.

BTW, I'm the daughter of immigrant parents, and I think you're doing a great job of being open to cultural differences in your daughter's upbringing in the US.

[Anonymous]

I don't know if this is still the case, but when I was 7 making friendship bracelets was THE thing to do at sleepovers. It's inexpensive and keeps them engaged for hours!

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you very much for your helpful responses. I will let them stay up a bit more, love the night-light idea too, and I will let them know they can wake me up for any reason. What are friendship bracelets? They sound great but not sure what they are.

Thank you again!

[Anonymous]

When our DS started having sleepovers, we left an old baby monitor in the room at night. The house is big, the boys are on a separate floor from us. We told the guest(s) that if they needed us, the could just call our, and it didn't have to be loud--we'd hear them and come in. And that they could also wake up our DS to go get us if they didn't feel comfortable coming into our room. The boys were pretty young when they started wtih sleepovers (5), so this seemed to alleviate some of the anxiety for the boys staying over.

THe added bonus is that you can hear them if they don't go to sleep in a timely fashion.

OP, just curious--where are you from that sleepovers weren't common? I'm not from the US either, but we did them when I was growing up (Germany).

[Anonymous]

Friendship bracelets or any other simple craft project would be perfect. If you're short on time (who isn't?), just buy a kit -- very simple. One project that my daughter and her friends loved at that age was making "tooth fairy pillows" -- there's a kit for this and it involves just simple sewing and decorating. Each girl goes home with her own pillow to tuck her lost tooth into and for the tooth fairy to leave money in. They also loved making paper flowers and painting photo frames -- you can take a picture of the girls at the sleepover as a keepsake.

[Anonymous]

These are all great ideas, but don't feel like you need to "entertain" them every moment. In some neighborhoods once the sleep overs start they become almost a weekly thing. If it's a really special occasion, do some special things, otherwise dinner with your family (pizza or whatever) and a movie is more than enough.

One of the greatest things about sleepovers and spending time with friends is learning the different ways families work, different traditions and new foods. Although you'll want to be sensitive to allergies and ensure you have some things your guest likes, it is also a wonderful time for guests to try something new. My DD comes home from friends' homes often having tried things she'd only turn her nose up at at home. I'm always thankful to others for broadening her horizons.. kids are often much more receptive to new things when introduced by someone other than mom.

[Anonymous]

These are all great ideas, but don't feel like you need to "entertain" them every moment. In some neighborhoods once the sleep overs start they become almost a weekly thing. If it's a really special occasion, do some special things, otherwise dinner with your family (pizza or whatever) and a movie is more than enough.

I agree. We have sleepovers all the time (9yo DD, 8yo DS, and even our 5yo DS has had a couple of sleepovers) so we pretty much go about our business, just with another kid in the house. We have whatever we're having for dinner and then let them play or do what they want, or make some popcorn and watch a movie, then send them to bed. At this point, we end up with a kid sleeping over at least twice a month, sometimes more, and I would go nuts if I had to plan entertainment for them. In fact, I think one benefit of a sleepover is that you DON'T have to entertain them b/c they have each other to play with.

So I think you can do some special things since it's the first one, but you really don't "have to" to anything, especially if it becomes a regular occurrence.