DD traveling abroad with friend's high-profile family

[Anonymous]

Just track her on her phone like everyone else does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s MEC; BB; Lyford

Necker?

[Anonymous]

Op - love your post! This is very juicy and entertaining.

Your dd is clearly in for a good time time.

[Anonymous]

Op, I think your husband is being naive to think that with money/status comes safety. And no way would I think "well gee, as long as my daughter is with high profile people, I don't need to know where she is." That's weird.

I agree with this. The "high profile" thing would make me less, not more, comfortable. People make very weird assumptions and excuse all kinds of odd things when money and status are involved. No one wants to offend or inconvenience VIPs. Basic safety issues can get ignored, sometimes one member of the "high profile" family is a weirdo (oh that's just "Uncle Joe"), etc. Uber-wealthy folks are used to not being questioned. For me, that wouldn't extend to taking my kid somewhere out of the country. I'm the parent of a young adult in their group, not their household staff. If there was an issue with me reaching out to confirm plans and exchange contact info for an intl trip, that's a red flag I wouldn't ignore and DD wouldn't go. I'm struck that this isn't common sense for this parenting crowd. Money isn't everything, folks.

[Anonymous]

At 20 my parents never, ever knew what I was doing. Nor I them.

Adulthood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At 20 my parents never, ever knew what I was doing. Nor I them.

Adulthood.

As a Gen-Xer, same. But do you want the same for your kids? I don't. There's a mile wide between helicoptering and completely taking your hands off the wheel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She's 20!

Yes, perfect age to be trafficked.

White parents, I assume? You or your kid need to reach out to the parents to get the address. She needs to have location sharing on. She needs to have quick 2 minutes calls with you every day and you need to also have a code phrase to let you know that she is ok. Other than that, she can go and enjoy herself. If the family is kosher they should not have any problem in all of this.

Oh FFS. No high profile family is going to sex traffic their daughter’s T10,college friend.

OP, high profile college kids and their families are pretty picky about who they spend time with. If you start hassling the family or your daughter picks up on your worries and comes across as weird, the invites will dry up.

Instead of being paranoid, set her up for success by teaching her not to be impressed by wealth. If this goes well, it could turn into a lifelong friendship.

[Anonymous]

OP, high profile college kids and their families are pretty picky about who they spend time with. If you start hassling the family or your daughter picks up on your worries and comes across as weird, the invites will dry up.

Instead of being paranoid, set her up for success by teaching her not to be impressed by wealth.

Communicating about your own kid's whereabouts is not "hassling" anyone. Impressed by wealth, indeed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

OP, high profile college kids and their families are pretty picky about who they spend time with. If you start hassling the family or your daughter picks up on your worries and comes across as weird, the invites will dry up.

Instead of being paranoid, set her up for success by teaching her not to be impressed by wealth.

Communicating about your own kid's whereabouts is not "hassling" anyone. Impressed by wealth, indeed.

OP knows where her adult daughter’s whereabouts The adult daughter will find out where they’re going before the trip. If the daughter feels uncomfortable with the trip, she can decline.

OPs desperation to talk to the family gives social climber. Her own daughter told her she was being weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are being super weird

Agree. And I hope “J”’s parents’ house manager sees this.

Also, the “DD” is so incredibly grating. Stop writing that. One “D” is enough. She is your daughter. If everyone gets a screenplay initial, just use one “D.”

1 D stands for penis on all socials.

[Anonymous]

OP knows where her adult daughter’s whereabouts The adult daughter will find out where they’re going before the trip. If the daughter feels uncomfortable with the trip, she can decline.

OPs desperation to talk to the family gives social climber. Her own daughter told her she was being weird.

This area’s obsession with social climbing is so grating.

OP said she is literally googling resort names to try to figure out where her kid is going. DD won’t ask because she “doesn’t want to be weird” (thinking that asking for basic travel details is weird is a sign of deep immaturity). This is what I mean about wealth and influence. People don’t behave normally because they’re so concerned about losing access. Labeling a parent’s logical interest in knowing the out of country destination for their kid under the age of 21 as “desperation“ is looking at the world through a very distorted lens.

[Anonymous]

Shes fine / relax

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just track her on her phone like everyone else does.

This is the answer. But it's high-profile enough for OP.

[Anonymous]

Why not just ask for contact details?

Text from your daughter to the host girl:
Excited for the trip! I let my parents know I’ll be travelling with you over break. They asked if you could pass along the best contact number and location, in case they need to reach me. Just for emergencies.

And they wanted to share their details (attached) with your parents, in case your parents need to reach them. Thanks for passing info along….


Or whatever organic language she uses to paraphrase.

My young adult daughter is a travel nanny for a high net worth/high profile family. She signed a non disclosure agreement to get the job. During the interview, she asked to add a clause that stated she could always share her location and travel details in advance with only her own parents.

That request got her the job. It demonstrated to the employers that she had a solid sense of safety practices and good judgement.

If these people are as high-flying as you say, they will completely understand that a young adult woman should always have a family member or trusted adult aware of her whereabouts. And your daughter should gain the maturity to understand that as well.

You don’t need to call and say hello. But you do need the number/location.

[Anonymous]

DD is 20, not 16. You tell her to go be safe and have fun.