Citizen son and I'm an ''out of status visa''

[Anonymous]

Trying to explain but in a short way.

My son was born here while I was with my EX American citizen ( we would get married in 2 months after my son was born) I came as a tourist.


After our son born he start to abuse me phisically and mentally all the time. I didnt know that I could call the cops for help I really thought they would just take me back to my country without my son so I suffered in silence ( working as a nanny, petsitter etc..) taking my son with me or leaving with babysitter for about $100 a week...now after 3 years,

I find out online that I wouldnt be deported and my son and I could ask for help so I end up living at the shelter.... which was clean, people helped me ... I couldnt proof everything and I couldnt apply for U-VISA. mysons father got depressed and he seems ''changed'' my son miss him so much and I went back with him. my life started to be a nightmare again, HE promise me to marry me and we could have a ''normal''life since then I could have my status changed and after a while I would have my green card which would let me DRIVE,WORK,BE ON HIS HEALTH INSURANCE etc..

My son was totally potty trained and happy with ''mom and daddy together'' but I knew I would end up hurted again because he has alcohol and angry issues, possessive and aggressive with me ONLY he was good with our son.

I packed my things and left... my son now lives with him and I'm depressed without a job and thank GOD I have someone that helps me here and there.


I wish I could have my papers, or a GREAT lawyer so I could do something. my son talks to me on the phone almost everyday (when hes dad calls me).

Really hope a lot people are not in te same situation as I am.. and if anyone knows ANYTHING HOW TO CHANGE THIS SITUATION PLEASE POST HERE I WILL BE CHECKING OFTEN.

THANK YOU.

[Anonymous]

OP, what are the main things that would help you?

[Anonymous]

Right now,

I fulltime job to prove to court that Im able to at least afford my sons visitation... and a safe place so he can sleep/live

I have no credit or job to afford a studio..

I could find furniture on craigslist but I'm so depressed i dont know what to do ... !

[Anonymous]

my son says on the phone wispering..'' I want to go to mommies house...'' and i tell him soon baby mommy loves you a lot and I tell him some of the ''goodnight moon'' that I know in my head and he gets happy

[Anonymous]

I understand that you are in a hard position but I am not sure why you left your son with someone who is abusive and has alcohol and anger problems. Why didn't you take your son with you to the shelter like you did the first time. i know you want to get a job / stable housing etc to give your son a better life but I would be concerned about his safety given what you have written.

[Anonymous]

Can you do a VAWA self-petition? Unlike a U-visa, you do not need to have cooperated with law enforcement. You need to convince thw agency that you are married to a US citizen or permanent resident and have been a victim of DV. Where do you live? There are organizations that provide free or low-cost immigration assistance in the DC area. The wait for assistance is long, but they are out there. You should also look for legal aid in you area for free legal assistance on the custody matter, though if you are homeless, you have a difficult case (as no doubt you are already aware).

Best if luck to you and your child. I'm sorry you are going through this.

[Anonymous]

I've never beeing married to him !

He used this marriage thing to keep me around I was sblind and ignorant about everything.

and I didnt take my son to the shelter with me because He was doing good at school that we enrolled (kinder care) and karate classs.. he has his own room and his dog I dont know what i was thinking... I didnt want my son thinking that i was trying to take daddy from him i just dont know hat was rong w me

[Anonymous]

beeing married would be everything VAWA would accept RIGHT AWAY! and I would be able to work/study/drive/rent... if I got married.

[Anonymous]

Sorry, OP, I read your post to say that you married after your son was born. Since you did not marry, VAWA relief is not available to you. I still suggest contacting legal aid in your jurisdiction for assistance with the custody matter. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

There is nothing else I can do besides marring an america. Citizen... Or being hurt phisically so I can do all the paper work against SOmeone else and be protect by the government applying for the U VISA. I went to 3 lawyers and I live online to see if I find something that could help me.

[Anonymous]

How Long ago did you leave?

[Anonymous]

I am so very sorry about your situation. There is an organization that helps immigrant women suffering from domestic violence deal with their legal issues. It's called the Tahirih Justice Center:

www.tahirih.org.
[phone]

I have worked with them before and they are real experts in this area. If there is a legal solution to your problems, they should be able to help you find it.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Tahirih is a great organization that can help you deal with immigration issues (to the extent there is a solution) and the custody issue. If you are in VA, Legal Services of Northern VA may also be able to help.n the provide free legal assistance to low income residents facing a variety of issues (in this case custody and visitation). They can be reached at 703-778-6800. If you are in MD or DC, please let me know. I'll look into some organizations that may be able to help.

[Anonymous]

Troll.

[Anonymous]

I'm also feeling the Troll vibe from you, "good night moon." Ha-ha.

I don't normally condone women returning to a domestic violent relationship, but in this messy situation, I would advise you go back to your ex and marry him and become a permanent resident. Then divorce him.