We have a temporary agreement, and have filed for divorce. The temp agreement is no longer working. |
~ 6 months to 1 year each time |
I was afraid of that. Is there any way to speed it up? |
If the other parent is in agreement to the change, the yes, it can be really fast. |
I don't think they'll agree. |
Custody tends to shake out after all the hurt of court is behind you and the focus are on the kids. It usually evolves to an informal arrangement as the kids get older and generally pleasant co parenting relationship. Hang in there. It'll get better. |
He’s 2. That seems a really long way away. |
Most courts favor 50/50 and if that's what you want, it'll be granted barring some extraordinary circumstances. Make it as easy as possible for your son, but after some adjustment period, you'll find your new flow as a family. |
I'd go ahead and file for 50/50 right away. If you don't have that now, the current arrangement can be set as the "norm" and be harder to change depending on how far out the next court date is |
We have a version of 50/50 now that isn’t working. |
What is the schedule and why isn’t it working? |
So we have 50/50 in terms of hours over the year, and I pay child support based on that, but my stbx skips a lot of parenting time, and relied on others to do the parenting, including my 10 year old.
They are supposed to stay with her and attend camp in her area for summer. I think for my older it will be ok but I don’t want my 10 year old being responsible for the little one. |
You will waste a lot of time and money on lawyers trying to get more than 50/50 And/or pay less. A ten year old is legally allowed to watch younger children in most states. Many parents in your shoes don’t try to pay less but instead find ways to make it easier on their kids, ie, make sure the camp is high quality and the kids will enjoy it, or take on more time without paying less. It’s tough but reality. |
You could ask for first refusal to have the kids if she's unable to watch them for work, etc. And if you're unavailable then she can get a babysitter. |
She doesn’t notify me that she won’t be there, she just doesn’t show. |